Page 118 of Release Me

That I’m not some misguided soul seeking justice through the judicial system.

He looks into my eyes, and he sees that the only things I believe in are the bullets in this gun and the ease with which I’ll pull the trigger.

I step closer, and his hands go up as he backs into the wall. The way he stumbles backwards makes me think of Nadia doing the same thing, of her backing away, running from violence he was so intent to bestow upon her.

“Hey, man, you don’t want to do this,” Beau’s voice shakes, and I laugh again because he has no idea, does he? He doesn’t know that I’ve been dreaming of this moment since before I even knew his name or the sorry story of his life. He doesn’t know that the moment I laid eyes on Nadia, the threads of our fates intertwined, and I became her justice and his reckoning.

“Yes, I really do.”

43

NADIA

Iwake with a start, sore and disoriented because for the first few seconds of consciousness, my brain forgets that I’m no longer in the hospital room. I lie still, allowing the details of the day to wash over me. Coming home from the hospital in the early evening. Trying to sneak and take a shower on my own. Bathing with Sebastian while he washed my hair and then falling asleep in bed beside him.

Before he got into bed, he said he had some work to do, so I slip out from in between the covers and pad through the halls of the penthouse toward his office, trying not to be triggered by the eerie quiet that reminds me of the day of the attack. Pushing out steadying breaths, I open Sebastian’s office door, expecting to find him sitting behind the large oak desk working on some time sensitive problem only he can solve and letting out a sharp gasp when I find the room empty.

“Babe?” I call out, leaving the office to check the kitchen even though I know from the first time I passed through it, that it’s empty.

“Nadia?” The sound of Russ’ voice causes me to nearly jump out of my skin, and I spin around to find him walking through the front door. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I was just looking for Sebastian. What are you doing here?”

Russ shifts on his feet, looking uncomfortable. “Seb had to step out for a minute.”

“Oh.” There’s something odd about his expression, about the deliberate vagueness that answers my question but not really. I walk around to the fridge and pull out two bottles of water, keeping one for myself and sliding the other over to Russ who’s now standing on the opposite side of the island. “Did he say how long he’d be?”

“No, but he should be back any minute now.” He takes the water bottle between his large palms and holds it there without opening it. “You feeling okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“And the baby?”

I take a small sip of my water and run a hand over my stomach. “Doing great as far as I know.”

“Listen—” Russ starts, but I shake my head, already knowing what he’s about to say. I’ve gotten the same speech, in some form or another, from every member of my security detail over the last few weeks. Tyler was the first to make it, lamenting over eager he was to leave that day because he was hungover and needed the rest. Then came Enzo and Jared, who expressed his regrets over not clearing the penthouse before they left me. Russ is last, and as the team leader and the only member of the detail who knew me before, I know the situation is weighing heavily on him, so I waste no time absolving him of his guilt.

“You don’t have to apologize. At the end of the day the only people responsible for what happened to me are Vince and Beau, and one day, they’ll get what’s coming to them. I don’t know when or how, but I have to believe that. I have to believe that I’m not bringing a child into a world where the karmic scales always balance out in the favor of low lives like those two.”

Russ rubs at his chin, another strange look on his face. “I appreciate you saying that, but I still want you to know that I won’t ever forgive myself for the way things went down. It won’t ever happen again.”

Any response I might have given him is blocked by the lump of emotion forming in my throat. It’s always there these days, when I’m reminded that I have so many people in my life who love and care for me. People who know my past and have literally seen my bruises and still want me around.

And the man leading the pack, the one who started the trend of goodness in my life, just walked through the door.

Russ and I look up when we hear the front door close, but I only I seem to be surprised by the gun he’s just pulled out of his waistband. Russ just walks over and takes it from him, removing the magazine and examining the remaining rounds inside it.

“Sixteen.” Russ looks at Sebastian’s hard features. “You only fired once?”

Sebastian’s eyes land on me, and he must see the horror on my face because he hesitates before responding, averting his gaze from me as he says, “Once was all I needed.”

I lose my grip on the water bottle in my hand, and it lands on the counter with a heavy thud, the cold liquid splashes up, wetting my night gown and sending a chill through my entire body.

“You shot someone?”

Sebastian and Russ share a look, and I watch the silent communication with frustration clawing at my chest. I need answers, and I need them now because there’s a gun in Russ’ hand that Sebastian fired, and they’re both so calm it makes me feel like I’m losing my mind.

“What’s going on, Sebastian?” I ask, my shrill voice laced with panic and confusion as I step around the island and go to him. He reaches for me with the same hand he was just holding the gun in, and I know that I’m crazy, that I’m past the point of common sense, because I’m almost certain he just killed someone and I don’t even attempt to back away. I take his hand and let him lead me into the office. Russ doesn’t follow, so when the door to the office closes, it’s just Sebastian and me in the room with my fear.

---