Page 92 of Restore Me

“No, I don’t mind at all.”

“Then come sit your ass down.”

Mal pats the cushion beside her. I sit down and laugh to myself because she and Dom both have a habit of bossing me around my house. She grabs the remote and turns on the TV, scrolling through the options before landing on some trash reality TV show I only watch with her.

I scoot into the corner of the couch and pull a blanket over my legs. “You sure you okay?”

“Yes.” She slides into her own corner and stretches her legs out. “And that’s the last time you’re going to ask me.”

“Fine, but just know I’m here if you want to talk. I’m also very serious about kicking his ass, for the old and the new, so just let me know when you want to cash in on that.”

“As much as I’d like to see you try, I don’t think that will be necessary.”

“Try?” I put my hand on my chest, pretending to be appalled even though we both know the likely hood of me taking down a man Chris’ size is slim to none.

“Yes, try. You’re a lot of things, babe, but a fighter is not one of them.”

I wave my hand dismissively. “Please, I still know all of the self-defense moves from that course we took in college sophomore year.”

Mal snorts. “Shut up! We went to one class, and you left halfway through to go to the fair with Eric.”

Now I’m laughing, remembering the way Eric peeled out of the parking lot when I came flying out of the gym, lured in by his promise of fried Oreos and funnel cakes. The only thing my brain retained from that class was how to get out of a front chokehold, but even that is fuzzy because I only saw the demonstration and never actually performed the move.

“Okay. Maybe I can’t take him, but he gave me his word. He should be gentlemen enough to let me beat him up, especially since he was given a warning.”

“Yeah. Good luck with getting that man to keep his word.”

Bitterness shimmers in her eyes, and I can practically see her brain carrying her far away, back to the exact moment she realized she couldn’t trust the man she loved. That she couldn’t count on him to do the things he said or keep the promises he made to her. I turn my attention to the TV because it feels wrong to watch her relive another painful moment. My heart aches for her, for whatever future she pictured with Chris that will never come to pass.

When she finally snaps out of her reverie, I pretend to be engrossed in the mess playing out on the TV. Surprisingly, it’s more of a disaster than the dinner we just had, and we sit quietly, watching rich women who remind me too much of my mother and her friends, argue at various high-end restaurants in their city. After a few episodes, both of us are yawning and half asleep.

“Alright.” I stand up and stretch. “I’m going to bed.”

“Me too, as soon as this episode goes off.”

“Just remember to turn the lights off. Night.”

I blow her a kiss and head upstairs for what I know is going to be a sleepless night. I close the door to my bedroom and head straight to the shower. I take my time washing, shaving, and moisturizing in hopes that the monotony of the tasks will distract my brain from the sad,empty feeling burning a hole in my stomach.

My bed looks as lonely as I feel as I climb into it. The side I didn’t realize I’ve come to think of as Dom’s is noticeably empty and cold, and it takes me several moments to get comfortable between the sheets. I roll my eyes, annoyed at myself for not being able to make it one night in the bed I’ve slept alone in for years without him. Part of me is starting to rethink agreeing to his rule about sleeping in the same bed every night because if sleeping alone is hard right now, I can’t imagine what it’s going to feel like when this is done. Everything is quiet around me, nothing but the sound of my own breathing is in my ears as I try to force myself to fall asleep.

“You can do this, Sloane,” I whisper to myself. “You’ve done it before.”

And I have. Four years ago when my sanity depended on being able to fall asleep without the warmth of Eric’s body against mine and the sound of his breathing in my ears. But this is different because Eric was gone, lost to me forever along with all of the things I loved about sleeping next to him, and Dom isn’t lost to me yet. We still have plenty of time together, and he’s just across town in his loft, hopefully having as hard of a time sleeping as I am.

I roll over and grab my phone off the nightstand. My finger hovers over his name for less than a second before I press the call button and put it to my ear. After a few rings, he picks up.

“Missing me already, angel?” The smile in his voice is unmistakable as it filters through the speakers and washes over me, and even though I know he can’t see me, I’m smiling back.

“Just calling to make sure you weren’t ambushed again.”

I turn on my side and close my eyes, pretending like he’s in bed beside me, rubbing small circles on my back while he whispers in my ear.

“Ahh. Well, in that case, you’ll be happy to know I’m perfectly safe and alone here. No exes lying in wait and no broken glass to clean up.” Papers shuffle in the background as he sighs into the phone. “I miss you.”

His admission lights me up from the inside out and erases the smart remark I was going to make about his ill-timed joke. A dumb smile stretches across my face, and I try to hide the quiver in my voice as I respond. “I miss you too. What are you working on?”

“Just looking over some plans Andre sent me earlier.”

---