Page 138 of Restore Me

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I don’t know how I make it from the tenth floor to the sidewalk in front of Dom’s building. But one second I’m on my knees in front of him, telling him how much I love him, and the next I’m swiping at tears that refuse to stop coming as I walk towards my car.

Every step I take seems to make the crack in my chest splinter more, and I have to force myself to keep moving. Putting one foot in front of the other even though I think I can feel myself actively dying. But every beat of my heart reminds me that it’s not me. It’s the hope—for me, Dom, and our future—that was bursting out of me on the drive over. It felt like a flower in full bloom, shifting from tight buds to beautiful, unfurling petals reaching towards the sun.

And now the edges of the petals are turning black, curling back onto themselves before breaking off and floating away.

My eyes are on the ground, tears blurring my vision, as I make my way to the parking area for visitors. People are walking around me in both directions, everyone too busy or caught up in their own world, to notice the heartbroken woman moving at a snail’s pace on the sidewalk.

Not that I’m complaining. Running into anyone, but especially someone I know, while I’m crying outside of Dom’s building would be embarrassing and weird. I probably wouldn’t even have the capacity to come up with a good lie about being here, which would mean risking people finding out about us when everything is already done.

Knowing I don’t want to deal with the heartbreak of losing more of the people I love, I open up my bag and start to dig for my keys. I’ve just put my hand on them when my shoulder collides with someone else’s, almost making me drop everything. Startled, I look up with an apology already on my lips.

“I’m so—” The words die on my tongue as my mind puts a name to the familiar face staring back at me. Thin lips curled into a scowl masquerading as a smile, brown eyes filled with displeasure, flawless, tawny skin over cheekbones that are more prominent today than I’ve ever seen them thanks to the sleek ponytail she’s wearing. “Kristen.”

My heart sinks as I try to imagine what I must look like right now. Eyes puffy and swollen from tears that are still falling, clothes wrinkled like I’ve just rolled out of bed, hair in a messy bun that’s probably got more than a few loose strands flying around.

I hate the idea of running into her looking like this, but my ego has to take a backseat to the panic coursing through my veins. I rack my brain for something to say, thinking maybe I can play it nice and distract her from the fact I have no reason to be outside of Dom’s place on a Saturday evening looking like I’m doing a walk of shame.

“Sloane.” She crosses her arms over her chest. There’s a small gift bag dangling from her fingers, and I wonder absently if it’s for Dom. “This is the last place I’d expect to run into you.”

“I know right?” I glance back at the building and force out a laugh. “Dominic needed me to bring some papers by for the hotel renovation we’re working on together. Did he tell you about it?”

“No. I don’t think he mentioned it.” She looks me up and down, and I shift my weight to my other foot. “Forgive me for staring, I just don’t think I’ve ever seen you dressed so…casually.”

I bite my lip. Letting her take such an evident dig at me is pissing me off, but I know I have to play it cool because acting cagey and defensive will only make her more suspicious.

“I know!” My voice is a little too high and overly friendly as I spit out the first thing that comes to mind. “I was on my way back home from Ash’s when he called. Hence the sleepover clothes.” I gesture awkwardly at my outfit and laugh again. “You remember Ash right?”

She studies me for a second; her eyes snapping with frenzied energy that reminds me of the look the doctors on Grey’s Anatomy get when they finally crack a case, and for a second I start to get nervous. Then she throws her head back and laughs, and my worry dissipates.

“Of course! He’s such a nice guy.” Her lips quirk. “Please tell him hello for me the next time you guys talk.”

“I definitely will.” I move around her, rifling through my purse for my keys. “See you later, Kristen.”

“How was he?”

The words reach my ears just as my hand lands on the keys at the bottom of my purse, and I drop them again when I spin around to face her, wondering if I imagined the double entendre.

“Excuse me?”

“I said how was Nic?” She takes a few steps forward, her ponytail swishing as she closes the distance between us. “Was he in a good mood? I mean, I know you two haven’t always gotten along, but I’m sure you know him better now after working with him for so long. In your expert opinion, is it safe for me to go up, or should I turn around now and give him his gift later?”

She dangles the bag in front of me, and I struggle to keep my face neutral. The idea of her going up there and being with him when I can’t makes me want to throw something.

“Um. I didn’t pay much attention to his mood, but I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.” I finally pull out my keys and wave them at her. “I’ve got to run. See you around.”

Kristen waves and gives me a smile that’s supposed to be friendly but feels all wrong because it doesn’t match the triumphant glint in her eye that makes me feel like she’s just caught me in a lie.

“Later, Sloane.”

44

Sloane

Now

Mal takes one look at my shower cap, ratty old sweats and the half-eaten bowl of ice cream clutched in my hand and frowns. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

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