Page 31 of The Roses I Left Behind (The Bellevue Trilogy)

Chapter Forty-Three

The Cunningham estate was filled to the brim with the crème-de-la-crème of the New Orleans gentry and those from neighboring parishes. There were at least three hundred people in attendance, making the mansion glow with gaiety as the food, wine, and conversation flowed throughout the night. Amidst the sea of faces, Rachel Cunningham searched tirelessly for her daughter. Earlier, when she saw Elizabeth with Thomas and his Yankee cousin, there was a veil of sadness around her eyes despite the beautiful gown she wore and the heavy jewels that adorned her slender neck. But as the host, Rachel had been pulled in no less than fifty directions as guests continued to arrive in steady waves. After a few minutes, Rachel finally caught sight of Elizabeth as she stood sandwiched in between two military officers who were trying their best to beguile her with their charm. There was no sign of Thomas which was even better. Rachel quietly made her way to Elizabeth and politely whisked her away.

“Thank you for coming to my rescue,” Elizabeth said in relief. “I was drowning in boredom.”

“It’s no matter,” Rachel said, as she linked her arm through Elizabeth’s and began walking slowly in the warm, night air. “The evening has been passing so quickly and I wanted to make sure we had an opportunity to spend some time alone. And talk.”

“You’re awfully kind, Mother.”

“Why wouldn’t I be? You’re my favorite.”

Elizabeth blushed, not quite really sure how to react to the comment that clearly diminished her older sisters.

“Of course, your inability to smile, even at a party, leaves one curious,” Rachel observed. “You don’t look happy.”

“I’m tired. And people are a chore.”

“This is true. But you can’t ignore the observations.”

“I’m not really concerned about what others think about me, Mother.”

“You should be,” Rachel said bluntly. “You are a Cunningham, and your every move is watched whether you like it or not.”

“I’m more concerned about why my husband no longer loves me.”

Rachel looked up at the night sky. “Ah...so, you’ve hit a rough patch and now you think the world is over?”

Elizabeth began to tear up. “Thomas...his heart...his heart and mind are no longer with me.”

“He does love you. Just not in the way you want him to.”

“Then why do we get married at all? To merely breed and not realize our own dreams?”

Rachel stopped. “A woman can never fully possess a man unless he wants to be,” she said. “Your goal, over time, is to create that desire. And if it never happens, then so be it. Enjoy what does come to you.”

Upon hearing her mother’s direct and candid words, Elizabeth broke down and cried. In between the tears, she poured out her heart while Rachel listened and struggled to maintain her composure. Hearing her daughter reveal the heartbreaking details of her marriage, including the letter she had found from Thomas’ nigra wench, was a bit too much to take.

“And there it was...tucked in between the plantation ledger.”

Rachel took out a handkerchief and wiped her daughter’s face, knowing a plan was needed if Elizabeth was to survive the emotional turmoil. Rachel lifted Elizabeth’s chin with fingers that sparkled with diamonds and looked her squarely in the eyes.

"Firstly, you will stop this ridiculous crying at once,” Rachel demanded. “Allowing yourself to become upset over a man’s transgressions is utter nonsense. I should know. What you must do is use your head and apply the lessons I taught you. To begin, I wouldn’t worry about the letter. It was written years ago, so why do you care? All men, at some point in a marriage, have had feelings for a woman other than their wife and Thomas is no different. The quicker you accept that, the better. And why should you care who he loved before he married you? And even if he is still in love with her, what does it matter? You are his wife now. No woman can pose a threat to you. You have everything and she has nothing. She’s a nigger. A wretched nigger."

"But Mother, the slaves are always talking about her," Elizabeth said, as new tears sprung in her eyes.

“So?” Rachel said matter-of-factly. “Beat them like the beasts they are and put an end to it. That will stop the gossip.”

"I would have, but Thomas forbids the slaves be beaten, even if they steal.”

Rachel took Elizabeth firmly by the arms.

“He may be the man butyourun that plantation,” Rachel said, her voice firm and commanding. “Never forget that. The overseer won’t say no to you. And if he won’t do it, do it yourself. Thomas will adjust. What else will he do? Divorce you? Besides, there are other things to worry about. What you must focus on right now is getting pregnant, and you can’t do that if he keeps going back and forth to the guestroom. A man needs a woman and a strong one at that. Continue acting like a spoiled child you will only push him further away. Starting tonight, be a little more pleasant and show him that you are a devoted wife and love him, even if you don’t. Otherwise, he will go out and find a mistress and you’ll forever live in misery.”

Elizabeth continued to fight back more tears as she struggled with the reality of her mother’s words.

“Come,” Rachel said, taking her arm. “There’s a party to attend and people to please. We will sort out the rest later. Together.”

Chapter Forty-Four

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