Page 94 of I Think He Knows?

She nods. “Yes. Hang in there, okay.”

As I head to my class to prepare for my day, my brain is spinning with many different thoughts that will have to wait until later. My kiddos are counting on their teacher.

* * *

I sit cross-legged on the reading carpet and start rearranging the bookshelves. I kept myself extra busy all day so I wouldn’t think about seeing Cam with his arm around Lilly. Now that it’s quiet, I’m alone with my thoughts.

There were many days I sat in this room and thought about the next time I would run into Cam or sit with him at lunch. The anticipation was exhilarating. But today I’m not sure how I feel. I know I’m seeing Cam tomorrow night for Eliza’s party, and I’m wondering if I should just go alone. It’s such a pivotal night for everyone, and I want to celebrate with my friends without being distracted.

I pick up my phone and find Cam’s number.

Would you be upset if I cancelled tomorrow night? It’s a huge night for Eliza, and I feel like I should be there to help with everything. Raincheck? I’m so sorry.

This isn’t a lie. And as much as I want to spend time with Cam and sort out my feelings, it can wait until after tomorrow.

Just as I’m getting ready to leave, my door opens and in walks Cam.

“Hey,” I say. “I sent you a text.”

He nods. “I got it. I totally understand, but I wanted to make sure everything is okay.”

I swallow the lump that’s forming in my throat.

“Yeah.” I pause. “Mason is proposing to Eliza before the party.”

Cam raises his eyebrows. “Wow. That’s big news.”

“I know. Anyway, he’s freaking out about it and the surprise party. It’s going to be so hectic with all their family and friends. I don’t want you to be bored.”

He nods. “I get it. Maybe we can get together on Sunday?”

I want to say yes more than anything, but I need to sort it all out in my head.

“Cam…” I stop as I try to hold it together. “Maybe it would be better if we—take a step back.”

Ugh. Just saying this makes me nauseous.

“Take a step back?” he repeats. “Let me guess—because of Lilly. I’ve told you there’s nothing between us.”

“Nothing except five years of experiences and close family relationships,” I reply.

Cam drops his head. “Fine. I understand…but I’m not going anywhere, Serena.”

He turns to leave without another word. Tears threaten the corners of my eyes, and I manage to hold them in. I need to keep my composure at least until I get in my car. After that I can cry the whole way home, all night, and then be ready to celebrate Eliza tomorrow. This isn’t the first time I’ve cried over Cam, but at some point, it will need to be the last time.

Chapter Twenty-One

Brunch with my best friend is exactly what I need this morning. It was an emotional night dealing with all my feelings for Cam and of course the impending events of today. But now I’m ready to have an amazing time celebrating one of the best humans I know.

I wake up early after a mostly restless night of sleep and send Eliza a birthday text immediately.

Surprisingly I haven’t heard from Mason since early yesterday, so I send him a text checking in on him. He might still be asleep, but I doubt it.

My phone buzzes immediately.

“Good morning,” I answer.

“Morning,” Mason says.

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