Page 75 of While You Sleep

I stumbled forward and grabbed his jacket. “I wanted proof of what my father did, what he had planned, not what he said about you. I just, I wanted to show him I wasn’t his to control, that I wouldn’t blindly do what he said anymore. That’s all. I never lied to you. I told you how I felt and I meant it. I lo—”

He pressed his thumb against my lips and shook his head. “I am not a good man, pet. I don’t like lies, and your pretty words and fake declarations won’t work on me.”

My head jerked back. “I’m not lying, please, you have to listen to me—”

“I had planned to kill your father, right after we were married.” His frigid green gaze held mine. “He’s weak and pathetic and not fit to be our ally. As for Celeste…” He shrugged. “I didn’t care one way or the other. Tommy, I would bring here. A gift for you, for my wife. Your father mistreated you, he didn’t deserve to live.”

I blinked up at him, stunned, but saw the truth in his eyes.

God, he was so incredibly broken. I’d been getting through to him, but he’d pulled back. He had retreated to the shadows. “But you didn’t go through with it…you changed your mind.” Horror at what he said filled me, but this was Cillian, he could be monstrous but not to me. If I’d known before, if I’d asked him not to do it, I knew with everything in me that he wouldn’t have. Now? I wasn’t so sure. “Did you kill him last night?”

“No.”

“Are you going to?”

“He’s not worth wasting a bullet.”

“Is Paolo dead?”

“Yes.”

“What are you going to do with me?” I asked. He wouldn’t hurt me, even now, after everything that happened, even though he believed I’d betrayed him. But if he sent me away, if he cut me out of his life, I wasn’t sure I’d ever find a way back. Whatever came next, I’d accept it. As long as I was here, I could try to get through to him.

“It appears you are no longer my wife, Sophia.”

Pain sliced me through my chest. Tears filled my eyes, there was no holding them back, spilling over and running down my cheeks.

Cillian gripped my chin, watching my tears flow. “You’re afraid,” he said, mistaking them for something else.

I shook my head. “I’m not crying because I’m afraid. I’m sad.”

“Why?”

“Because I loved being your wife.”

He flinched. It was subtle, but I didn’t miss it. “You can’t help yourself, can you? The lies fall from your mouth so easily.”

“It’s the truth. What are you going to do with me, Cillian?”

He dragged his thumb over my lips. “I told you, I don’t give up what’s mine.”

He wasn’t going to send me away, that was a start.

“But if you’re no longer my wife, pet, the only position for you here…” He gripped my chin. “…is whore.”

I tried to jerk back, but he held me fast. “You don’t mean that.”

“Your things will be moved to the room next door, where you belong. Only my wife shares this room with me.”

“Cillian…”

He released me and walked away, shutting and locking the door after him.

Jesus, that hurt, so damn much, but I refused to believe he didn’t care about me anymore. He was angry. He thought I’d betrayed him. He said he didn’t have a heart, but he did. He’d just let it bleed in front of me and he didn’t even know it.

He was hurt. I’d hurt him.

He was a man who didn’t understand his own emotions, shutting them down as a neglected and abused child had kept him alive, it was a defense mechanism, and he was doing it again now. He didn’t know how to deal with what he was feeling, so he was lashing out, trying to cause me pain in return. Not because he hated me, but because he loved me.

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