Page 24 of Take My Hand

Carter shakes her head. “It’s not worth it.”

“But you’re entitled to what’s yours.”

“I don’t want anything that has had any part of him in this new space. He’s infected enough of me. He doesn’t get to spread that here. It’s just furniture.”

I open my mouth to argue, but she turns pleading eyes to me, begging me to drop it. I clench my jaw, willing the anger on her behalf to subside. If she wants to let it go, then there’s no reason for me to hold on to it.

“Well then, I’m glad you’re getting the fresh start you deserve.”

Fucking asshole. I didn’t like him from the moment I met him that first night on tour when we all did introductions and he blocked Carter out of the circle, insisting on being the mouthpiece for both of them.

I don’t know what she ever saw in him.

“He was charming at first,” she says, and it’s then that I realize I must’ve said that last part out loud. “He showed me a lot of what I know today about photography, and nurtured the love I have for it. That’s what we bonded over initially.”

It’s hard to picture him being nurturing toward her at all. The only sides I ever saw of him were full of arrogance, cockiness, and control.

And not in the way I like control.

“He isn’t all bad. I know you might not have seen it?—”

I snort, interrupting her and instantly feeling guilty when she scowls. “Sorry, I’m not judging you. Promise. It’s just that all I can see anytime I think about him is the way he had you crowded against the barriers before that show.”

The rage that welled inside of me in that moment was so visceral, so powerful, that even just thinking about it gets my heart pounding again. I will never be able to get the image of him yelling at her out of my head. The way her head was ducked down, body caved in but still standing, silently wracking with sobs as he berated her.

All because she forgot to clear the memory cards.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t grateful for the outcome, because by the way she moves with more freedom and her entire body seems lighter, she’s better off because of it. But that doesn’t make it any easier to digest.

“Trust me, I get it. I don’t expect you to understand. But there was a part of him that I loved and that I clung to for a long time. And when he felt my heart slipping from him, it’s like he trapped my mind tenfold.” A beat. “Trapped me.”

I sit silently, letting her continue.

“You know how people try to sandwich a criticism between two compliments? Well, Daniel did the opposite. It was always two insults with a backhanded compliment in the middle, just enough to keep me wanting to please him but also enough to keep me insecure and seeking his validation. Like he’d tell me that the composition sucked in one of my photos. But the subject was well placed in the frame, so good job on that. Although the lighting was shit and I needed to be more mindful of that next time.”

I’ve seen her photos. Not only the ones she took of the band, but her portfolio she has online has been flipped through more than once by me. And while everyone was busy eating earlier, I took some time to wander around her living space and take in the ones she had framed on her walls. She’s really fucking talented, and from what I can tell, I’d say Daniel knew she was better than him, and he didn’t want to allow her to see her full potential because she’d realize she didn’t need to be in business with him.

And if she went off on her own and got a sense of independence, who’s to say she wouldn’t also realize that he was dead weight in other areas of her life.

“And it wasn’t just work stuff either. He’d tell me that my chest was small and while he liked it, he knew other guys had different preferences so I should feel lucky that I’m with him and that he likes them as is.”

I can’t help the dip of my eyes to her chest before mumbling, “You have nothing to worry about in that department.”

Her cheeks flame.

“But when the person that is supposed to love you says things like that, you don’t really have any choice but to believe it. Because why would they lie to you?”

“To keep you under their thumb when they know that you’re strong enough to stand on your own and once you realize that, they won’t be able to keep you anymore.”

Only a coward would manipulate a woman like that. That’s what he is. A fucking coward.

He’s lucky I didn’t know the full extent of it while I had him by his collar that day, ready to unleash every bit of frustration from dealing with Reid’s bullshit, the fighting in the band, and trying and failing to write our fifth album, on his face.

“I realize that now.”

“Do you miss him?” The words come out more hesitant than I intended, but I’m genuinely curious. It’s been a few months now since they broke up, and while I’m not trying to make a move on her, not yet anyway, I need to know if there’s a part of her that’s still clinging to him.

“No.” Her answer is immediate.

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