Page 17 of Take My Hand

“Have you talked to Reid since our show last week?” I ask Nikolai.

“Yeah, he came over the other night.”

“And?”

“He doesn’t want to apologize.”

Nikolai and I have been trying to bridge the gap between Walker and Reid. After the meeting with Arun blew up, we thought we’d let things cool off a bit before Nikolai tried talking to Reid to see if he could get him to apologize to Walker and mend things over. If he got on board with that, then I’d talk to Walker and let him know that Reid wanted to apologize and see if he would hear him out. Then we’d bring the two of them together and hopefully get the band back on track.

But obviously Nikolai’s part with Reid failed.

“Jesus Christ,” I mutter, annoyed. “How does he not realize what he did was fucked up?”

“That’s the thing though. I think he knows he was in the wrong, but there’s something else bothering him that’s keeping him from owning up to it and apologizing to Walker.”

“Stubborn asshole.”

He lets out a small laugh. “Always has been, always will be.”

“And you tried to talk some sense into him?”

If Reid is going to listen to anyone, it would be Nikolai. He was the one who brought Reid into the fold all those years ago when we first created Whisper Me Nothings in high school. We all bonded over our shared love of music, but where Walker and I always connected on our love of movies and video games to bring us closer, Nikolai and Reid connected over women and going out. They have been each other's wingman for years, both always jumping at every opportunity as we toured the world to go out to new restaurants, hike, and get to see as many places as possible.

Nikolai and Reid could never sit still. A restlessness fueled them both, and Nikolai’s went into overdrive after the shooting. Not even Reid pushes the limits like he does now.

“He doesn’t want to hear it. I think there just needs to be some space between them.”

“They have had space the past couple months since the tour wrapped. I thought that would’ve been enough time.”

Nikolai just shrugs, but the movement is anything but nonchalant. Being in the middle is taking its toll on him. On both of us. Playing peacemaker for friends gets old, especially when our personal and professional lives are so deeply entwined.

“Maybe the break is inevitable,” I say, hating the words as they come out.

Nikolai darts his eyes over to Vinnie, worried about me talking openly about the rumored break in front of someone who is not within the circle.

“It’s none of my fucking business,” Vinnie says without even looking up, sensing Nikolai’s panic.

I smirk, then wince as the needles move over a spot that already feels like it has been flayed open. But I welcome the burn. Inhale the pain and let it fill my lungs until my mind calms.

“Almost done,” Vinnie reassures me.

“So, have you heard from Lauren at all since you’ve been back home?” I ask Nikolai, trying to get a rise out of him as he sits there looking lost in thought.

He groans, and I stifle a laugh. Just the reaction I was looking for.

“She tried calling as soon as I got home. I swear it’s like she knew the moment my feet touched the ground in LA and had been waiting. She left a message, but I haven’t responded.” Before I can even ask, he adds, “And I’m not going to. I’m not trying to be a dick, but I made myself pretty clear to her.”

While I love Nikolai like my own brother, I doubt he made it that clear.

Before we went on tour earlier this year, he had been dating Lauren, a gardening influencer, for a few months. And like his usual pattern, he fell hard and fast. Their relationship went from zero to sixty and he was convinced he was in love.

And I’m sure a part of him was. But just as quickly as he fell in, he fell out. Lauren, rightfully so, felt whiplashed by it. And when he tried to break it off, she went live on social media and blasted him for it.

“Is there anyone else then?” I ask him, knowing he always has his eye on someone.

His jaw clenches, and I track the movement with curiosity.

“There is, isn’t there?”

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