Page 37 of Bombshell

“Is that what you’re telling yourself?” he asked, grinning. “Because the way I see it, you don’t want to fuck her because you won’t be able to stop. You will want to keep her, and no woman has ever held that power over you.” He paused. “Not even Calista. When she left, you didn’t even chase her.”

Calista had been the only girl I’d ever loved. But that had been years ago. I started to argue, but stopped. Was he right? Was I scared I wouldn’t be able to get enough? That I’d keep wanting more?

“She’s a sweet girl. Too damn nice for the likes of your ass. But seeing as she looks at you like you hung the goddamn moon, I can’t say it’s a bad thing. She wants you. You want her. Just get this over and fuck. If she owns you after that, then so be it.. You’ve been a fucking whore for long enough.”

“Shut up,” I growled, stalking past him.

I wasn’t going to stand here and listen to this. I was going to get weak and give in. I needed to go wash her smell from my fingers. Get this out of my head. Stop fantasizing about it.

“It’s not a prison sentence. First taste I got of Goldie’s pussy, and I was done. Happily so. I didn’t want another one. She had all I needed with her pot of gold.”

I didn’t look back at him. He was one of the few happily married men I knew. Men weren’t meant to be tied down to one woman. It was their downfall. It messed them up. Took away their youth. I wasn’t falling into that trap.

I jerked open the door and got away from Brick and all his words that were digging into my skull and trying to settle in and stay. Telling me that just maybe I could have her. That it would be worth it. That I wouldn’t end up breaking her heart. I’d already hurt her once, and the idea of doing it again nearly brought me to my knees. I couldn’t stand it.

Getting her out of my head was what I needed to do. I’d go get one of the girls and fuck her until Dolly’s sweet scent was gone. If I didn’t, then there was a good chance I’d snap and lock Dolly in my bedroom and keep her naked in my bed all damn night.

18

Dolly

The pink cocktail that Goldie had given me tasted nothing like vodka. It was fruity with a slight kick to it. If I had to stay down here with these loud, rough, slightly scary people, then I needed something to ease my nerves. Two men had already gotten in a fight. Brick and Tex had broken it up. There was a blonde woman who was currently straddling a guy I didn’t know on one of the sofas, and I was afraid to look in that direction again because I wasn’t so sure they weren’t having sex.

“Hey, beautiful,” a guy I didn’t know said as he leaned against the bar, facing me.

I looked up at him and forced a smile. He was around my age, maybe a year or so older. His arms were bare and covered in tattoos, and he was lean but still built well.

“Off-limits, Pinch,” Nina informed him. “Go flirt with one of the club sluts.”

The guy grinned at Nina, but his gaze came right back to me. “Why would I want to do that when there’s a pretty thing like this one sitting here, all alone?”

“Unless you want Micah on your ass, you will walk away,” Nina warned.

He didn’t budge, but his grin grew bigger. “Micah’s busy fucking Dylan,” he replied. Then, he leaned closer to me. “Tell me, sweetheart, what’s your name?”

I’d never been hit in the chest, but I imagined that the current sensation that slammed into me at his words was what it would feel like. My nails bit into my thigh as I squeezed, trying to control the raw emotion creeping through me.

I wasn’t enough. I was never enough. I would never be enough. No one wanted me. I was nothing more than a pawn to the only guy who I’d thought wanted me. How much more rejection could I take before I cracked completely?

“PINCH!”

Micah’s shout caused me to jump, startled. The room quieted, and the guy in front of me paled as he began moving back from me, his eyes widening. The sting from my nails breaking my skin didn’t concern me. It was a relief in a way. The pain taking away from the reality of how unwanted I was. Reminding me of how I had once used that like a drug. I’d forgotten how it felt, how it numbed the truth.

“Don’t look at her again.” Micah’s voice was threatening. “Don’t talk to her. Don’t breathe her fucking air.”

“About time you got down here,” Goldie said to Micah with a scowl on her face.

Micah was beside me, his body close enough that his arm brushed against my back. “You okay?” he asked, leaning down toward me.

One hundred twenty-two, one hundred twenty-two, one hundred twenty-two.

“Dolly?” His voice sounded concerned.

I had to respond.

One hundred twenty-two, one hundred twenty-two, one hundred twenty-two.

I managed to nod my head. The guy he’d called Pinch muttered an apology in my general direction, then headed to the other side of the room.

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