Page 116 of Of Fate So Dark

“I-I’m not?—”

“The demon, man,” Clay snapped.

Roan’s head shook. “I don’t…” I could see his chest beginning to rise and fall faster. “I’ve never heard that word.”

None of the men appeared to believe that.

“He doesn’t know what he is.” I started forward, and Ozias gave a short growl. “I’m safe with him,” I insisted. “I swear.”

His teeth ground, but he didn’t protest again as I walked closer.

“Roan was adopted,” I continued. “No one in his family ever knew what the demon was.” I glanced at him. “It doesn’t even have a name.”

The other men were silent for a moment.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Dex asked him again.

I tensed, wanting to help and not sure what to say.

“Because…” Roan pushed to his feet, and the others took a step backward, their swords at the ready.

Roan’s eyes went to me again, his pain so clear that I knew this was the moment he expected them all to loathe him just as much as he loathed himself. “I’m a coward,” he said like it was the only explanation needed.

“What?” I protested. “No, you’re not.” I turned to the others. “He had a good reason. Truly. Can’t we just leave it at that?”

Only Dex reacted to the words, looking at me with a hint of apology.

My heart sank.

Closing his eyes briefly, Roan said, “I killed everyone I loved. My family. My village.”

The silence felt like glass on the verge of shattering.

A breath left Lars. “You said they were killed in the war.”

“By me.”

I floundered, shocked he wasn’t even trying to save himself. “It was an accident, though. He was just a child. He never meant for that to happen.”

“It’s what I am,” Roan said like I hadn’t even spoken. “When I lose control, people die. That… That’s what I believed. I lost control when the Aneirans came, and I killed everyone, and I couldn’t stop it. But I never told any of you because…” He scowled at himself.

Casimir’s voice came from the edge of the group. “Because you didn’t want to be alone.” He stepped closer, his eyes on Roan. “Because even though you feared what you were, your life with your friends let you feel like a man, not a monster. Like you were part of something.” His brow rose and his head twitched in my direction. “And so did she.”

Roan stared at him, so still I wasn’t sure he breathed. “How could you know that?” he whispered.

A soft chuckle left Casimir, sad irony in the sound. “Because you and I have something in common in that respect.” His brow rose and fell, his eyes skimming across the giants but not landing on any one of them in particular. “I suspect several of us do.”

My breath caught. He knew about Ozias. I had no question of it.

“You still lied to us, man,” Clay persisted tightly. “I thought we were like family. You don’t lie to family.”

Roan winced, clearly pained.

“You should have trusted us,” Lars added. “Like we trusted you.”

“I’m sorry. I…” Roan shook his head as if words were failing him. “I was too scared to risk it.”

Silence fell again.

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