Page 98 of The Edge of Never

“My dad, Olly and… me.”

Thane said nothing. He merely wrapped both arms around me and pressed me tight against his chest.

“I don’t remember a time when she wasn’t abusive towards Dad. A lot of it had to do with him being autistic. It steadily got worse after Olly was born until Dad kicked her out. Olly was six, and I was sixteen. Dad was given full custody. My mother had supervised visitation because of her history of domestic abuse.”

My parents should have never been together, but Dad didn’t know any better at the time. I didn’t blame him for staying with her for so long. It was hard to get out of an abusive relationship. And things had been a lot better for the three of us after we were free of her. That only lasted for a couple of years. Then things went very wrong.

“It happened a few days after Olly’s eighth birthday. She arrived at the house saying she wanted to give him a present. Dad stupidly let her in and that’s when she attacked him with a knife. She left him bleeding in the hallway and came after Olly. I tried to stop her, to protect him, but she managed to get both of us. The neighbours called the police after they heard screaming. It took five of them to restrain her. The three of us were taken to hospital. Olly and I only had minor injuries, but Dad now walks with a cane and has a carer who comes in to help him with daily tasks.”

I turned my face into Thane’s neck. Talking about it didn’t make me upset. I’d already dealt with my feelings towards her years ago after she was convicted. Cutting her out of my life was for the best. I’d never visited her in prison and lived my life as if she didn’t exist.

“She hated me and Olly, resented having us because we turned out like our father. She refused to accept that I’m non-binary, and she’s the only person who still uses what used to be my full name. Dad started calling me Kit after I told him I hated the name Katherine. I legally changed it when I was eighteen.”

Drawing my fingers out of Thane’s bun, I ran them across the soft hairs at the back of his head where his undercut was.

“So that’s why I refuse to have anything to do with her.”

“I dinnae blame ye. That’s fucking awful. I dinnae understand people who want tae take away another person’s life. It’s no right.”

“She had a shit upbringing, but it doesn’t excuse her behaviour towards us. I’ll never forgive her for what she did.”

I pulled away from him. Thane let me out of his arms, but he kept his hands on my waist as if he didn’t want me to escape completely. I didn’t want to be anywhere else but with him.

My fingers went to my clothes, tugging up my jumper and t-shirt. Thane moved his hands to my thighs. I twisted to the side and pointed out the small puncture-shaped scar on my left side. He stroked it with two of his fingers. Then I showed him my fingers where there was a faint slashing scar across them.

“This is where I stopped the blade going into Olly. I was lucky it didn’t go too deep. I had a few more cuts and scrapes, but none of the others scarred.”

Thane took my hand and pressed kisses to each of my scars. I trembled at his gentleness. At the soft look in his beautiful green eyes.

“She doesnae deserve yer forgiveness. She doesnae deserve ye full stop.”

He pressed my palm to his cheek.

“Thank ye for confiding in me. We didnae start off on the right foot, but I truly appreciate every part of ye that ye’ve allowed me tae see.”

Some people might think it should have been talking about my mother that set me off, but it was the man in front of me. His reaction to it. The way he understood me. I squeezed my eyes shut to stop tears from forming.

“You’re doing it again.”

“Daeing what?”

“Being nice to me.”

He let out a snort.

“Aye and am gonnae keep deaing it until ye realise it’s no me being nice, but me treating ye with decency and respect.”

A tear leaked out of my eye. We’d been put through the emotional wringer time and time again over the past week. I was exhausted. Mentally and physically exhausted. No wonder I kept crying. There was only so much one person could take, and I was way over my limit.

“Kit…”

“I’m so tired. It’s too much, you know. Everything we’ve had to deal with, it’s too much. I feel like I’m drowning. I can’t swim anymore. I want it all to stop. All of it for just a little while so I can recover my strength.”

The soft pads of two fingertips brushed away the tear streaking down my cheek. Gentle hands removed my glasses from my face.

“Come lie doon, and rest with me.”

I opened my eyes to find Thane reaching over to place my glasses on the coffee table. Then he encouraged me to lie with him on the sofa. He turned on his side. I curled up in his arms with my face buried in his chest. He stroked my hair and didn’t say a word, letting me rest.

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