Page 81 of The Edge of Never

“We wouldnae have stopped looking no matter what.”

I should have known that. Hope was in limited supply for me, but I knew Callan. He would have moved the damn mountain to get to me.

“What took so long, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“The avalanche. Several of the group got caught in it. We didnae realise ye were missing while we were looking for survivors. Dinnae worry. No one perished, but it was only after we got them oot that I realised the two of ye hadnae come back. The storm made it difficult tae mount a search for ye, but I knew Thane had his supplies with him. I was certain we’d find ye alive.”

I dreaded to think about what Callan would have done if I hadn’t made it. Probably cursed my grave. We’d always been inseparable. The best of friends. He made sure I got through Jenna’s death. And me? Well, I’d been there for all of the big events of his life. His first crush. When he came out. The day he met his husband. I coached him through the proposal. We were best men at each other’s weddings. Our lives were inextricably linked. I don’t think he would have forgiven me for losing my life in the mountains we both loved so much if he wasn’t going with me.

“Ye’d have killed me again if I died on ye,” I put in.

“Aye, ye’re fucking right, I would. We dinnae need more tragedy in oor lives.”

His words stabbed at a sore spot. I rubbed my chest, trying to dispel the pain radiating from it.

Kit noticed the movement. Their icy eyes softened. That look almost decimated me. They knew the total extent of it. More than I’d revealed to Callan.

That means something.

No, it doesn’t. I had to get it off my chest, and I trusted Kit to understand. That’s it.

Keep fooling yourself there, Thane. You’ll come around soon enough.

“Well, at least we’re all here, hey? Best not dwell on things that haven’t come to pass.”

Kit’s words had Callan eyeing both of us through the rearview mirror.

“Aye, right. Am surprised the two of ye are so… civil with each other,” he said with a smirk.

Kit’s entire face went a bright shade of red. They ducked their chin and wrinkled their nose.

“We called a truce, that’s all.”

It was so much more than a truce. Admissions of liking each other followed by baring our souls and… sex. I couldn’t forget that part even if I wanted to. Which I didn’t. The memories were burned into my brain. The way it felt. The rightness. The need. And the screaming desire inside of me to do it again. No matter how much I wanted to pretend it meant nothing, I couldn’t avoid the truth. I wasn’t ready to be done with what happened between us.

“Easier tae survive if ye’re no at each other’s throats,” I said.

“Aye. I wouldnae have blamed Kit for leaving yer grumpy arse in the stream.”

“I could never!”

The vehemence in Kit’s tone wasn’t a surprise to me, but it was to Callan. He glanced back at us with wide eyes before turning to the road again.

“I wasnae being serious.”

Kit didn’t look at either of us. They weren’t the sort of person to leave anyone behind. That kind heart of theirs wouldn’t allow it. And they cared about me, as misguided as that might be. I wouldn’t hurt them on purpose, of course, but they already knew I was stuck in an inescapable grieving cycle. They weren’t under any illusions about the two of us. At least, I hoped not for their sake… and mine.

Callan pulled up to the lodge a wee while later. The rest of the journey had been silent. Kit seemed uncomfortable, and I didn’t want to make it worse.

“If ye cannae drive, ye want me tae take ye home?” he asked, turning towards the back of the car after he switched the engine off.

“And leave the Defender here? No.”

“Ye got someone tae drive ye?”

He knew very well I didn’t. The wee shite was up to something. I could tell by the twinkle in his eyes.

“I can drive you.”