Page 101 of The Edge of Never

“Are you coming in?”

They stepped back as Sienna walked into my place. My hands fisted at my sides, wanting to throw her right back out of here. I kept my cool as Kit led Sienna further into the living room. They rolled their feet as they stood near the coffee table, looking anywhere else but Sienna.

“Why are you still here, Kit? You should be home with your family and friends.”

Kit rubbed their arms.

“I went through a lot out there. I just needed some space.” They looked up at their friend. “And I told you I didn’t want to see you.”

Sienna stared them down. She looked at Kit like they were nothing more than an inconvenience. That pissed me off, but I stayed on my perch on the sofa, waiting for it to play out.

“Did you expect me to stay away after my best friend went missing in the middle of winter? Do you think so little of me now? That I wouldn’t care?”

Kit’s hands fell to their sides. They rubbed their fingers together. They were agitated. I’d been learning to read the subtle signs. Kit might keep a straight face a lot of the time, but their body language gave so much away. It was clear as day if you knew what you were looking for.

“Honestly, Sienna, I don’t know any longer. You said some pretty cruel things to me the last time we spoke. And I’m not sure I can forgive you for that or if I even want to.”

“So that’s it, huh? You want to throw away our friendship over some things I said in anger? You looked like you were about to jump off the cliff. How do you think I was meant to feel seeing that?”

Their fingers rubbed against each other harder. Kit paced away and their expression grew grim.

“How you were meant to feel? It’s always about how you feel, isn’t it? It’s never about me. It’s always Kit did this to me, or Kit did that, but you don’t think about what you do to others. I was hurting, and you weren’t there for me even though I tried to be there for you.”

They sighed and closed their eyes, coming to a standstill in front of Sienna.

“I have no interest in fighting with you over this. Tell me the real reason you’re here, and no bullshit, okay? I don’t want to hear fake platitudes any longer.”

“Fake? You think I’m fake?”

“Sienna.”

She let out a huff.

“Fine. I need you home because it’s time we tried again. You’ve had long enough to deal with whatever it is you’re feeling. Come back with me and we can get ready for it.”

Kit opened their eyes and stared at Sienna with no emotion on their face.

“Are you for real right now?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I almost fucking died out there in the mountains and all you can think about is your need for a baby. God, you are so selfish. It’s always the Sienna show with you. All aboard the fucking Sienna train. You never think about anyone but yourself. You didn’t come here because you care about me. You came here to make sure I do what you want and give you a baby. Well, I’ve got news for you. That’s not happening. I’m not getting pregnant again. Not for you. Not for anyone.”

Sienna blinked rapidly, and then her expression turned to one of consternation.

“All right, Katherine, tell me how you really feel, why don’t you.” She scoffed. “I should have known you wouldn’t follow through with it. You never do with anything. You’re always making excuses and using your” – she made air quotations with her fingers – “disability as a way of getting out of things. No fucking wonder you’re too scared to do anything with your life. You’re too busy thinking everything and everyone is against you rather than actually making the effort to do better.”

Kit froze in place.

I stood up the moment Sienna called them by their previous name, unable to contain myself any longer. Then she kept pulling punches, and I was done. My eyes went to Kit, who looked more upset than I’d ever seen them be before. Sienna took the knife and dug it deep, twisting it several times to play on all of Kit’s insecurities and fears.

“That’s enough.”

Sienna took me in then as if she hadn’t noticed I was there before.

“Who are you?”

I marched over to them and put myself between Kit and Sienna, wanting to shield them.

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