Page 78 of Brutal Birthright

But this realisation was like having a weight crushing her chest while she lay prone and pinned to the ocean floor.

There was no way she could bring herself to beg Rowan to accept her as his fated mate. Even the mere thought of him rejecting her sent humiliation curling hot and tight in her stomach. He’d already proven how easily he could judge her and publicly shame her in some sort of misguided attempt to prove she had a lot to learn.

Ri would be the first to admit, albeit rather begrudgingly, that he had been right that day. While her intentions had been for the best, she ultimately proved to be reckless in her actions. The kind of selfish thinking that didn’t take into account many other moving parts.

So now, here she stood. Locked in an endless maze of her own mind, where the only solution seemed to be heartbreak at every turn. No matter which way she looked at it, she’d have to forgo her bond with Rowan. Could she ever allow herself to hope, and it would be against all odds or possibility, that the man might one day choose her?

A shiver ran down her spine. Not sure whether the thought of belonging to someone–or more specifically, Rowan–in that way gave her a thrill of excitement, or a deep sense of trepidation. The two emotions seemed far too closely connected at present.

Especially when her mind and body were still coming back to reality after a night spent with a tattooed brute of a man who had allowed her to be broken apart and put back together in the best way possible.

They might as well carve her a gravestone now and be done with it.

Herein lies the remains of Oriana. Cause of death? Unyielding pleasure and orgasms at the hands—and beneath the skilled tongue—of Rowan.

At least she wasn’t deranged.

Or going insane.

This feeling of all-consuming rage and spitting jealousy she’d been experiencing whenever she thought of Rowan with someone else. Every facet made complete sense now.

Even if she hated the knowledge that fate had stepped in to change the course of her very existence.

Ri stood staring at her perfectly made bed. The one she most definitely had not slept in last night. After Rowan portaled her to her rooms, he left with a searing kiss and a stern look that promised all sorts of wicked deeds when he next succeeded in getting her alone.

Leaving her floundering to find her brain. It must have fallen on the floor somewhere in the midst of that moment. Ri was left under no uncertain terms, this wasn’t going to be a one-time-only thing between them. His sapphire gaze burned into hers in a way that told her to expect much, much more.

He knew what he did to her. There had been something far too smug beneath that tightly sealed expression. Rowan might not give much away, but there was no mistaking the swagger as he disappeared, allowing Ri to head to class as if nothing were out of the ordinary this morning. She’d already decided to forgo a visit to the dining hall. There was no way she could handle seeing that many faces and trying to act like there was no big secret hidden behind her kiss-swollen lips.

Not like she’d just had her world upended, her pussy worshipped, and her soul thoroughly fucked into satiated bliss.

Next, it was time for a quick check to ensure that all Rowan’s marks were covered—and with a small gasp, she made a mental note to always remember to check the mirror from now on. The side of her neck was decorated with bites that weren’t going to be healing anytime soon. Prick.

No wonder he’d had such an air of smug satisfaction leaving her alone.

She might as well have his name tattooed around her neck like a collar.

The asshole would love that.

Perhaps she could discreetly make herself a healing salve in herbalism class to speed the process up? If she planned on spending any more time alone with Rowan, she suspected his marks were going to become a regular thing.

As Ri stepped out into the quiet hallway and sealed her door behind her using her magic, she gnawed on the inside of her cheek. Lost in the all-consuming thoughts of what this might mean.

Call it pride, or foolishness, or dumb stubbornness. But she would voluntarily travel to the ancestral plane rather than tell Rowan they were fated to one another.

She wanted him to choose her.

There was no other option.

By keeping this detail from him, at least, that gave him an opportunity to make a decision. She wasn’t some starry-eyed little girl with an infatuation. If this attraction between her and Rowan was potentially going to evolve into something more… Well, she needed it to be organic. Not forced. Not coerced by the Goddesses.

Rowan claiming her as his in the bedroom was one thing. All that possessive, alpha behaviour was easy enough to fall under the spell of. Merely scratching an itch when the two of them needed to satiate this physical need, hammering hard in both their chests. But choosing a future where she was a part of his life, wherever that journey took them after this year was through? Knowing they had connected on a level beyond just chemistry and something forbidden that drew them together in a fiery crescendo of desire?

That was what she wanted. Even if it terrified her to think what his decision might ultimately be. What if he decided she wasn’t worth it?

“Fuck’s sake, scary girl.” A small hand grabbed her by the arm. Brynne’s flushed face darted into her line of vision. “If you ever make me run like that unnecessarily outside of training, I will take one of those pretty little knives of yours and use it to hack off all your hair while you sleep.”

Ri bit her lip. Trying to rearrange her expression into something that didn’t look quite so plainly guilty. She wasn’t going to last five minutes today without giving their secret away. Not where the pink-haired whirlwind now attached to her arm was concerned.

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