Page 8 of Sworn to Lead

“Personal experience?” As soon as he said the words, his gut clenched. What if it was? If she’d been hurt? He already knew she didn’t like to depend on anyone but herself, was proud, and was reluctant to trust. He hated to think there was a specific person or event that had made her wary of others.

“Common sense.” Her face revealed nothing, but a shadow darkened her eyes. Only for a moment, but it was there all the same. He wasn’t going to pressure her into discussing something she didn’t want to. At least not tonight.

“I know you have your own minibar, but I brought these over. Wasn’t sure what you liked.” He hesitated. Maybe she didn’t drink at all. Questioning himself was something new, and it had everything to do with the woman standing in front of him in slipper-clad feet. Her presence made the floor tilt beneath his feet.

“Thank you.” She picked the white wine from his hand and carried it to the bureau, pouring the contents into one of the glasses near the coffee maker. “Jacob loved that giant stuffed penguin you got him at the aquarium, and the photographs.”

She didn’t know that he’d taken one of the pictures from the aquarium, too, and slid it into his wallet. Today was one of the best days he’d had in a long time, and he wanted to keep the memory. The bond he had with Jacob was growing stronger, and even though he still doubted his ability to provide care without Brynn, signing the guardianship paperwork today felt less like a duty he’d sworn to see through and more like the foundation of something beautiful. Something wholesome. He was scared to death.

“But…” Brynn continued, her voice taking on an accusatory tone. “You didn’t stick to the deal we made in the store.”

The sudden urge to kiss the determined frown off of her lips was so strong, it took him aback. Fuck. He had to keep things professional. Brynn took her drink to the love seat by the window and sat, tucking her feet beneath her. She took up so little space curled up, he sat on the other side of the couch instead of in the desk chair like he’d planned.

“How so?” Maybe he’d snuck in a few extra clothing items from the aquarium, and the seahorse, because when she watched them, her eyes had glowed with an ethereal wonder he wouldn’t soon forget. The stuffed animal was probably juvenile. Maybe she’d throw it in the back of her closet. The idea of her snuggling into bed with something he’d bought, gaining comfort from it, won out his internal tug-of-war and he found himself carrying it to the register.

“You don’t need to ask me that. If you think you managed to slip it past me, you’re wrong. The bag you gave me after dinner tonight—the sweatshirts. The stuffed animal. You found a loophole in our deal and exploited it to the fullest.”

Goddamn. That pout on her lips. Adorable. “I wouldn’t say to the fullest. I could’ve loaded up a shit ton more, but I figured you’d get sick of hoodies with mermaids and sea creatures.” The mermaid on one of the sweatshirts had caught his eye. If the mythical sirens were real, he’d imagine they’d look like Brynn with her dark hair and big eyes. “They’re just a couple of souvenirs. You’re doing something profound for me. Makes me want to spoil you a bit.”

Brynn made a strange sound in the back of her throat and took a gulp of wine. “I appreciate the gesture, but I don’t need to be bought. When we make a compromise, it’s important to me that both sides keep their word.” She held her chin a bit higher. “And I’m not doing this for you. I’m doing this because I can’t stand the thought of not being in Jacob’s life.” She squared her shoulders, making her point clear. He loved how despite their differences in size, she’d look him in the eye and argue toe to toe. Her ability to call him on his shit was only part of her appeal. Everything about her was clean and fresh. Her skin glowed and her cheeks carried a pinkish hue. The bar scene was no longer for him, stale and tiring like the women who always approached him. Layers of makeup, heavy perfume, and one common goal—to bed a SEAL. Brynn was refreshing and carried an air of innocence that fired up all his protective instincts.

“I’m sorry. I guess I wasn’t thinking of it from that standpoint. But Brynn? I didn’t buy those things for you. I bought them for me because I couldn’t stand the thought of you leaving the place you call home without at least a memento of it.” Her mouth gaped as he threw her words back. “So, aside from the library book, what loose ends do you need to tie up before we leave the state?” he asked, sitting with his body angled toward her.

Her expression grew pinched. “The van. I hadn’t even thought of that. I’ll need to drive it to Virginia.” She tugged at her bottom lip. The action might have been involuntary, but it aroused him to no end. His body may have different ideas, but at least his mind had processed that Brynn was off-limits for too many reasons to count. If he lost her, he lost an excellent caretaker for Jacob. Plus, he didn’t have the first clue how to tend to his brother’s needs. Without Brynn, he and his brother would be left vulnerable. “I have another two months left on the apartment lease. I need to let the landlord know. He probably has an early termination fee, but I can always mail a check.” She absently rolled her shoulders before taking a sip of her wine.

He didn’t need her getting worked up about the move. She was already taking a huge chance, and her second-guessing herself was the last thing he wanted. “First, how attached are you to the van?”

“It’s a means of transportation.” She shrugged. “Point A to point B.”

“I’m not saying this to be a prick…” He trailed off when she tilted her head. A strand of hair fell forward, trailing down the outer corner of her brow and playing against the apple of her left cheek.

“Usually if you have to lead with a statement like that, it means it’s true.” She raised one brow and leveled her gaze over the rim of her glass.

And hell if she didn’t have a point there, but he didn’t want her to think of him that way. So many others, his mother and women who had known the score before they jumped into his bed, had branded him as cold, suspicious, unlovable. She waited for a response, lips still poised along the rim of her glass.

“The van looks like it’s a few drives from its final destination at the junkyard.” He crossed his arms firmly over his chest, then cursed the action, which probably made him seem defensive.

Her cheeks puffed out and a spray of wine misted over his face. Her eyes went wide, her face tinged with pink, and she dissolved into laughter. “Oh. My. Gosh,” she panted between breathless chuckles. “I’m so sorry.”

“Didn’t know I’d be traveling with a damn camel.” He swiped his hands over his forehead and cheeks, flicking off the liquid. There was a smile plastered to his face. The tear that leaked from the corner of her eye did him in. The laughter started deep in his gut and tumbled out, shocking him. Not that he never chuckled at the occasional wisecrack Branch spouted off, but their line of work was serious. His world was often saturated with the worst humanity had to offer, and the lives he took, while necessary, scored his soul. Brynn’s and Jacob’s laughter was a floodlight shining through the dark. A beacon. Something hopeful.

When her laughter died, he sobered. She cleared her throat and looked away. “I really am sorry. That was an accident. The way you said it just sounded so…well, dramatic.” Her slender, unpainted fingers plucked at a loose string on the robe. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. I haven’t laughed like that in a while, but in all seriousness, I’m buying a new accessible van when we get to Virginia.” He didn’t mention he’d be buying two. It made more sense if both he and Brynn had the means to transport Jacob.

“That van was provided to me by your mother.” She stood up and took her empty glass to the counter. “It’s more yours and Jacob’s than it is mine. Whatever you want to do with it is fine. I have no attachment to it.”

Another way his mother had let Jacob down. Instead of buying him a safe means of transportation, she squandered all her inheritance. Brynn’s mere presence tempered some of his anger, and she was returning to the couch. He was trying to be a gentleman, but he couldn’t help but notice the sway of her hips when she walked, or how her shapely her long legs were. “All right, that’s settled. And the apartment? The thought of you putting another dime in that landlord’s pocket pisses me off. Let me take care of that for you. Please, Brynn.”

She shook her head, and the strands framing her face swayed with the motion. Her bare feet were silent on the carpeted floor as she came to the couch. “I don’t want any fights on my behalf,” she said, sitting and pulling her legs beneath her once again.

He leaned forward. “Because he violated the terms established by the Department of Public Health for a rented dwelling, you’re leaving the premises effective now. No fight will come of it, but mark my words, should the need arise, I will fight for you, Brynn.”

Her brows scrunched together, as if she thought his statement was ridiculous. “You can try, but if it doesn’t work out, I’m prepared to pay the rent because that’s what I signed up to do.”

He stared at her for a moment. She was so hellbent on doing the right thing, it drew him back to his questions about her past. “Is Jacob able to fly?” he asked, changing the subject. There was no way she was paying that landlord, but he’d keep that to himself.

“He has no flight restrictions, but we’ll have to leave for the airport early in case he needs an additional security check, and I imagine it might take longer to board with a wheelchair. He’s only flown once that I know of, before I worked with him. As far as when to leave, I have what I need for Jacob and me. I do have several calls I need to make to his medical supply company. They’re the provider that sends enteral nutrition and things like new attachments for his feeding tube each month. I’ll do some research in the morning and have them transfer his prescriptions to another company in the Virginia area.”