Page 97 of Promise to Break

Chapter thirty-seven

Maricela

Being angry at a person doesn't make you miss him less. He called me a whore and disappeared like it was nothing. I want to lash out at him, and I want him to make me forgive him. I want to see him and touch him. I want him here.

"Has he contacted you yet?" Raven supports him without questions. In her book, Killian's an asshole, but she says it wasn't him who spoke to me the way he did; it was his uncontrollable jealousy. Jealous of my teacher? Really? I never showed interest in any man in this god-forsaken place, and Killian knows that.

"He did." I show her the text message I received from Killian, which brings a blush to her cheeks.

Cabron: I will come back to fuck the anger out of you, Little Girl. You are mine, all mine. I am so fucking sorry. Please let me know that you forgive me.

That was his last message before his plane took off. Apparently, the brutal games the mafia plays demand that they participate in these trials without any communication whatsoever.

"He said he was sorry," Raven points out. "Did you tell him about your plans to open a restaurant?"

"No. I didn't tell him a thing. I was too angry with him."

"You're allowed to be. But, Mari, don't let it ruin the best thing that ever happened to you. The two of you are lucky as fuck to have found each other."

The four days that have passed since I last saw him have helped me calm down. Yes, he was an asshole, but I can see why he was mad.

"Mari? Fuck girl, make up with him already. You act like children, you two. Tell him that you don't want to go off to travel in the wild. That you want to stay here with him."

"Maybe I do. I don't know. Photography was, is my passion, and I've gotten an offer. Maverick wants to pay me for my work. That's a big deal."

Raven studies me with her head tilted as if she's trying to read me. "He's not Mr. Hope anymore?"

"Don't start you too, okay? You know I'm not interested in him that way." I stop pacing and plop into a chair with a heavy sigh. "I get that you're trying to protect your favorite person, but there's no protection needed. I do not want my teacher."

"He is hot, though," she admits with a giggle.

"So you go and fuck him. You wanted to fuck someone before the end of school, and it's the last day."

Her sad expression guts me. I want to tell her how I truly feel about Killian, but I don't because I can't love someone like him.

"It will probably be easier outside of school anyway. Dad managed to give me six years of freedom before… Or at least the illusion of it. I'll marry Liam when I turn twenty-eight, and I'll lose my virginity by then."

"You will. You're a beacon of sunshine, and Julian and I will be there, and we'll help you lose your V card."

"The airhead in me is thankful." She bows her head, allowing me to see the silver strands she added to her hair for her last day at school.

"You're not an airhead."

She twists her lips into a smirk. "How did this conversation became about me and my nonexistent sex life?"

"Because Killian isn't here. I'll talk to him when he comes back, okay?"

"Are you going to forgive him, then?"

I'm afraid to give her the answer because…fuck. I think I will, and it scares me. What will be the limit of my forgiveness? And does such a limit even exist anymore?

"Think about it," she says when I don't respond. "He'll return from Italy soon. Give him the answer that's fair to both of you. If you want to see the world, you can do it together."

I nod, and we proceed to the cafeteria for the last time. I hated this place for the most part, but knowing I'll be leaving it behind after today brings all my fears to the surface. I know I'm lucky, more than anyone I know, that. Still, I can't imagine my life after this.

Santino and Serena couldn't come today, and while I imagined them always being close by, on some level, I'm grateful they aren't.

"The girl of the hour is here," Lila shouts as we walk in.

---