Page 74 of Promise to Break

"Killian!" my father had barked, causing Mom to startle. I shook my head at her. She couldn't do a thing, and we both knew it.

"You! Letting a woman, a girl, disrespect me in my own house. Look what you're making me do." I spit blood onto the cement floor, letting it mingle with the remnants of times before when I was locked in this room for hours on end.

"Say something!" he demanded. I didn't, but not because I couldn't speak. I just refused to. Maybe because he was getting older, or maybe because I was getting used to the pain.

"I have new orders for you," he said, his face all sweaty and red. Yes, he was definitely becoming weaker, I thought to myself, and I knew that one day I would see him here in this very room, flogged by my hands.

"You have to break this girl," he said. "No woman will speak to a man of my family like that. Break her spirit, or you know what will happen."

Chapter twenty-nine

Maricela

My second-grade teacher believed that seeing love was impossible. " Love is not something you can see, Maricela. It's here," she'd said, pointing to her heart.

"So, how will I know if I love someone or if someone loves me?" A naïve question from a desperate child who wanted to be loved by the only two people she had.

"By actions. Show what you feel by being kind to the people you love."

To this day, I wonder if my actions are sufficient. Have I done all I could to show my love for Serena? Looking at the angel with the luscious head of hair—likely the cause of my sister's constant nausea—makes me want to grab the beating organ in my chest and gift it to her. I want to slay her demons before they ever come to try and harm her.

Raven wraps a hand around my arm and leans into me. "Chica, I was looking for you." She smiles as big as I've ever seen her, and I smile back. With her, I know I can show my emotions with no judgment whatsoever. We just stand there for the longest time, watching the miracle that is life.

"She's so precious. Congrats, Auntie."

Auntie. I've never given power to that word. I will be her aunt. I am her aunt. Instantly, I know I will be the best I can be. I can already see myself changing her diapers, making her laugh and trying to do everything I can to stop her tears. I have a new purpose because of her. For her.

"Thanks," I say, leaning into Raven as she does me, in no hurry to leave the viewing window.

"She looks just like him," Raven says again. It's uncanny."

Constanza Fierro looks just like her uncle and her grandmother. Even if she's more of a squashed potato right now than a clear human. I can see it. The second I saw her, I knew she was a Fierro, and not because of any resemblance to her dad. She is everything that Killian is, and her hair is just one thing that is all him.

It's more than that. It's how calm she was when the nurse poked at her while other babies cried. It's the way she holds her hand in a fist, as if knowing that everything in the world will be granted to her just because of who she is. She is everything good that her uncle is.

"She does, doesn't she?"

"Don't you want to go and see Serena? She's asked for you."

I nod. My fear is gone now, and all I feel is happiness. "Can't we take Connie with us?"

My friend giggles. "She'll get to her mom soon enough. I'm sure she needs to eat. Let's go." I look back at the baby. I don't want to leave her here, even knowing that she will be very well cared for. "Nothing will happen to her," Raven assures me.

Serena rests on a high bed in a huge, bright room that could fit ten patients more with flowers all around her. Her hair looks freshly made, and her face is freshly done with light makeup. Her dressing gown looks as fancy as ever, nothing like the pajamas or nightgowns of our days in the slums. It's like she didn't give birth just an hour before. She looks good, as stunning as ever, even if her eyes are splotchy with what I imagine were tears. My sister is beautiful even when she cries.

"Hey, Mari. Isabella told me you saw Connie." I've never been good with words. Actions have been my emo all my life. But now I wish I was able to tell her how happy I am for her.

"Congrats. She's beautiful, Mama." I copy the words my friend said to me, and if the smile on my sister's face says anything, I did right by her. She opens her arms, and I go into them. Serena and I never were too much on the physical side of showing affection. I learned about the art of hugging, as Raven calls it, from Julian, her, and Ronen, who is a big hugger.

"You make some really beautiful babies," Raven adds when the hug between us clearly gets awkward. The conversation after that is light and full of witty remarks with sexual innuendos about Santino's ability to produce beautiful babies.

A nurse enters with a very cranky and unhappy bundle in her hands. "Hello, new mama. I think your baby is hungry." She lays the baby in Serena's arms, who takes her with care.

A moment later, I feel him as well as he enters with Isabella, who looks at me with a sad smile in her eyes. She always looks so sad, even when she smiles.

"It's so different," Serena whispers as she takes the baby from the nurse.

"What is?" Santino asks, speaking for the first time in a long while. He's probably too happy to do so.