Page 28 of The Risk of Falling

“Honestly, Abs. It doesn’t even matter to me really; I just don’t want to see you unhappy. You’re hurting, and I don’t know how to help. You hurt, I hurt,” she tells me. I feel the urge to cry again. What the hell is wrong with me. Rosie continues, “What Parker said, he’s wrong. The thing is, though, I don’t even understand why he would say those things to you. Can you maybe just start at the beginning so I can understand and be a friend to you?”

The beginning. Good Lord, we were fire from the start. It was sex. Amazing sex. And that was all it was ever supposed to be. Rosie doesn’t want that beginning, so I settle for the more PG-rated version.

“Parker and I met one night at a beach party. We didn’t know just how much our lives were already intertwined. We laughed and drank a little too much, and we slept together. It was supposed to be just that one night. Then almost a week later, you and I ran into Drew, Mrs. Nallen, and Parker on the street. We were both shocked, to say the least,” I confess, taking another bite of my ice cream.

I can see the wheels turning in Rosie’s pretty little head. She’s trying to piece everything together. “So that is why you two were acting so strange. I remember thinking you were being weird but blew it off,” she tells me.

“Yeah, imagine the shock of coming face-to-face with your intended one-night stand,” I say. Smiling a little now at the memory. “I had already thought of him more than I wanted to before I knew who he really was. Then he ended up being Drew’s brother. God, Rose. You know me, I’m never affected by a guy, but good Lord, I was by him. He got to me before I even knew his name,” I confess. A brief smile plays across Rosie’s lips, so I continue. “We agreed to keep our distance for yours and Drew’s sake, or so we said, but I know I was really trying to protect myself from what he stirred inside me.”

“Abs…what are you saying?” Rosie asks me.

“I wish I knew,” I tell her. “I’m scared, Rosie, but I think I messed up. Parker tried everything he could to break through to me. I’ve kept him at arm’s length. You heard him last night.”

“I did, and like I said, Parks is wrong,” she says, reaching her hand out to mine and squeezing it in reassurance.

“Is he? Because even now I sit here knowing I want love. Knowing I love you. I even know I’ve fallen for him, yet I can’t.” I say, feeling defeated.

“Don’t do that, Abbey. You deserve love, and I can promise, Parker is a Nallen. They don’t play around with the heart. I just ask you to think about all of this and be sure. I don’t want to see Parker hurt because, even through all his angry words last night, I could feel his devastation. Don’t hide from love and be certain—I will support you regardless because, Abbey…” Rosie waits for my gaze to meet hers. “I will always support you because I love you.”

Tears threaten once more. I hear everything she says. Smiling at her, I reply, “I know you do because you brought me Chunky Monkey.”

We both laugh, and it feels good even though there are so many things I need to work out, and I don’t even know if I can.

“Abbey, promise me you won’t ever use me as an excuse to avoid love again,” Rosie says seriously once our laughter subsides. Looking up at her, I nod my head. “I’m serious,” she continues. “I believe everyone deserves to be loved and have their happily ever after, so don’t run away from it because of me.”

“I get it, Rose. I promise,” I take her hand as I make this promise and look her in the eyes, so she knows I’m serious. This time she gives me a small smile and a nod of her head. I wish everything was as easy as making a promise to Rosie.

Twenty

PARKER

Ilay a drop cloth out, lining it up with the wall, as Drew lays another across the room. We’re painting one of the rooms in my house today. I’m trying to focus on that. Not to mention that our dad will be here soon to help, and I’m trying to be ready.

We’ve been planning this for weeks, yet this morning I’m not sure I’m up for it after last night’s fiasco. I’m still reeling from all the emotions. I acted like an ass. I can admit it. I should’ve walked away, but instead, I lashed out. The combination of jealousy and alcohol. It wasn’t pretty. I don’t even know where to go from here. I just know I need to put this behind me and get through Rosie and Drew’s wedding. I can’t completely run from this, and I can’t leave my apology unsaid. I need a clear head so I can say the right things and figure out how we move on from here.

Drew’s voice echoes from across the empty room, “You know you were a real dick last night, right?” He keeps prepping for painting, never looking up. I don’t have a chance to respond even if I want to because, at that moment, there is another voice with coming from the direction of the doorway.

“That’s putting it mildly.” Drew and I both look up to find Rosie staring us down.

Drew straightens quickly and begins to walk toward her. “Oh hey, babe,” he says.

She quickly puts her hand up, “Oh no you don’t, ‘oh hey, babe,’ me.” Her gaze never leaves mine. She is pissed off. I’ve never seen Rosie mad, but I recognize a simmering anger anywhere. Drew must recognize it, too, because he stops in his tracks and slowly starts moving to the side.

I break our eye contact and continue my work as a distraction. I get why she is upset, but I don’t want to talk about it. I need to think, and thinking doesn’t involve outside opinions. Before I know what’s happening, Rosie is standing directly next to me.

“You hurt my friend,” Rosie says, her voice holding less anger than a moment ago. I keep my head down; I can’t look at her. “You were…you are so wrong. And that—well, that is disappointing,” she continued.

“Well, I’m hurt, too,” I tell her. I recognize it is the wrong thing to say, but, in a way it’s what I feel. Even if that hurt isn’t relevant right now. Even if that hurt is basically self-inflicted.

Ignoring my statement, Rosie sardonically lifts one eyebrow as she stares at me. “Parker, Abbey cares about you. I’ve never seen her react the way she did last night. And it isn’t because you said some awful things to her but because she believes the things you said. Because she cares more for you than she has ever allowed herself to care for anyone. Ever. You are wrong.”

“Rosie’s right,” Drew chimes in. “This is exactly what I tried to tell you when I first found out about this thing between you and Abbey. She’s guarded, and you needed to make sure you talked things out with her. That way, you would have both been on the same page, and no one would have gotten hurt.”

I hear Drew, but I quickly notice Rosie’s glare isn’t on me any more; her gaze is directed at Drew now. “How long have you known?” she questions. Drew’s attention snaps to Rosie. Her mouth is hanging open a little, and I can see shimmering tears threatening to spill over. Damn.

I can see regret in Drew’s eyes as he looks at her face. “Rose, they didn’t tell me. I—I suspected it for a while and finally confronted Parker. I didn’t want to make a thing about it until I knew for sure. When I asked Parker about it, I wanted them to work this out on their own,” he confesses, running a hand over his face and through his hair.

“Please don’t be upset. They were hell-bent on protecting us, and I just wanted them to leave us out of it. They are both so great at making up excuses as to why they shouldn’t fall in love.” I snort when he makes this statement, and they both turn their heads toward me.