Page 44 of You Belong With Me

Zach nodded. “Yes, it’s good.” He didn’t offer anything more. Eli knew he didn’t really like to talk about music while he was in the middle of making it.

“Tricky thing,” Billy said.

Zach looked over to where Billy was standing by the rail of the deck, a bottle of San Pellegrino in his hand. He looked tanned and healthy, his short graying hair sticking up in spikes. But he didn’t look entirely relaxed, his dark eyes focused on Zach.

“What’s tricky?” Zach asked.

Billy flipped his free hand at him, the gesture somehow dismissive, as though Zach should’ve known what the hell he was talking about. “Making a comeback. Comebacks are a bitch.”

Zach frowned. “I wouldn’t call this making a comeback exactly. It’s not like I’ve done a solo album before. This is more like adding another option.”

Billy raised his eyebrows, but he only grunted in response and then turned to stare out at the ocean. Zach studied his back for a moment, wondering if he was going to add anything more to his pearl of wisdom. Or what exactly he’d been trying to say. After all, after Grey had died, Billy had seemed to transition smoothly into his new role with Erroneous. The band was doing very well and Billy always looked like he was having a good time playing with them, sitting up at the back of the stage, behind his drums, pounding away.

Of course, “very well” for Erroneous was nowhere near the heights that Blacklight had reached. Did Billy miss that, that being on-top-of-the-world feeling? It had to be hard to give it up once you’d had it. The adrenaline buzz of the crowd could be an addiction, no matter who you were or how well you were doing.

As the crowds got bigger, the buzz did too. Zach knew that as well as anybody. Though for him, it was the music that gave him the buzz, not necessarily the crowd. He couldn’t deny that hearing hundreds or thousands of people singing along and cheering while he played wasn’t satisfying, but it was riding the music itself that he loved.

But maybe he just hadn’t hit the level where the crowd would take over as the source of the fix. Fringe Dweller were doing okay, but they weren’t making a meteoric rise by any means. More like a slow build, and maybe that was better. Blacklight had catapulted to the heights early in their careers. And while that had brought money and financial security, it also caused all four of them problems over the years. Drugs, alcohol, family pressures from grueling touring and recording schedules. Along with the stress of always having to top your last effort, though that was the same for any musician. Hell, it was what he was trying to do now.

“Any tips for changing paths?” he said.

Billy turned back to him, shrugged. “Make great music. The rest doesn’t mean shit.” He straightened his shoulders. “Right, I’ve got crap to do. You two have fun.” He walked off the deck and disappeared into the house.

Zach looked at Eli. “He’s in a mood.”

Eli shrugged. “He always starts getting antsy a month or two before a tour.”

“Isn’t being here supposed to be distracting him from that?” Billy had always been the most tightly wound of the four Blacklight guys. Grey and Danny had been wild, and Shane was quiet in comparison to the other three. But Billy had been … well, the one who’d seemed to take the weight of the world on his shoulders. He’d used his share of drugs and booze to take the edge off, just like the others had, but it had always seemed to Zach that Billy had been the one to start fights.

“He’ll be fine,” Eli said, glancing back over his shoulder in the direction Billy had gone.

Zach hitched a shoulder. “If you say so.” He picked up his beer. It was still early. He didn’t really feel like going back to the guesthouse. What he really wanted to do was swim, but with Eli still bandaged and braced, it would be kind of a dick move to suggest that. Lansing wasn’t exactly known for its wild nightlife. So the options were limited. But there was one place they could go. “If Billy’s in a mood, why don’t we go to Salt Devil? Get out of his hair for a while?”

Eli hadn’t objected to his proposal, so twenty minutes later, Zach found himself sitting on the deck of Will’s bar, beer in hand and fries and onions rings on their way. Two slices of pizza hadn’t exactly cut it as dinner. He looked out at the ocean, tilted his glass at the view in appreciation. In all the time he’d spent away from Lansing, he’d forgotten how chilled life could be here. And how much he missed the ocean never being far away.

“You look happy,” Eli said. “I take your sessions really are going well?”

Zach nodded, propping his feet up on the deck rail. “Yeah, we’ve made a good start on three songs this week.”

Eli swung his own chair around to stretch his booted foot out on another chair opposite Zach and then sampled his own beer. “It’s working out with Leah then?”

“Yeah, she knows her shit. She’s killing it, actually.” Zach said. “But don’t worry, I still want you to work on those two songs with me. Just let me and Leah get through this first week, find our groove or whatever.”

Eli was still watching him with an odd expression in his brown eyes.

“Unless you don’t want to do that anymore?” Zach said. Was that the reason that Eli was looking so weird? He’d changed his mind?

Eli shook his head, face clearing. “Nah, I’m still happy to do it.”

“Then why are you looking at me like I just grew a second head or something?”

“Just trying to remember if I’ve ever seen you look this happy over a couple of songs before.”

Zach narrowed his eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Eli shrugged. “Just that things must be going really well.”

Where the hell was this going? “They are.”

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