Page 41 of Obeying His Rules

“Because it’s true.” I smile. “Come on, put your shoes on. I’m double-parked downstairs, and I don’t want someone trying to tow me.”

There’s really no risk, of course, but at least it gets her moving. Rain turns and slides into her Converse and takes her jacket from the chair. She grabs her keys and steps into the hall, then quickly locks the door behind her.

“Where are we going, Marlon?” she asks as she follows me down the stairs and outside.

“Out of the city,” I reply, holding the door for her. “It’s a bit of a drive.”

The ride to the bridge takes just under a half-hour, which is a bit of a miracle, but we manage to luck out with the traffic. More people are coming into the city than leaving tonight.

Not much is said as we drive. I play some down-tempo rock that’s basically just background music and can see Rain is still mulling over the fact that she just lost her job and what she’s going to do about that, but the car is not the place to have the discussion I want to have with her about all that.

There’s a twisting sensation in my chest as I round the curve and the bridge comes into view. I haven’t been here since Jennifer jumped–since she died–and not much has changed. Maybe the trees and brush has grown up a bit, but it pretty much looks just like it did five years ago.

I clutch her necklace–tucked deep in my pocket–as I pull up and park, then take a deep breath as I feel Rain looking over at me.

“Where are we, Marlon?”

It takes me a moment to answer. I guess I didn’t fully realize just how powerful it would be for me to return to this area.

“Come,” I say, opening my door. “I want to show you something.”

I step out and start walking toward the bridge. Rain opens her own door and gets out and quickly catches up with me. I look up at the stars, shining brightly overhead.

At least it’s not pouring.

I reach over and take Rain’s hand in mine, hearing her surprise from a sharp intake of breath. But she immediately wraps her fingers around mine without hesitating as we walk together.

For a girl who loved pressing me with so many questions, she sure knows now is not the right time to do so. She remains silent as we approach the bridge, and I stop at the metal decking and look down.

Like the last time I was here, the water is rushing below. Even from this high up, it sounds like a cavernous roar, rumbling from beneath our feet. Images of Jenny on the stretcher come rushing back, and I quickly push them aside and take a step onto the decking.

I lead Rain over to the railing and look down at the white-caps, lit by the early moonlight, churning beneath us like a chilling grinder. But I can only look for a moment before I have to look back at Rain.

Her face breathes a warmth back into my body that instantly calms me.

I stare at her for probably too long, but she doesn’t show any signs of discomfort. Finally, I manage to summon up the courage I’ve known all day I’ll need for this.

“Five years ago, my girlfriend killed herself by jumping off this bridge.” Rain gasps and covers her mouth with her free hand. I reach into my pocket and pull out her necklace, showing it to her. “You can ask me now.”

Rain looks at the necklace, then at me. Hesitantly, she asks, “And that was hers?”

“Yes. I’ve never been able to let go. Every year I go to her grave and I bring flowers…pink roses…her favorite.”

“Marlon, I’m so sorry…” Rain says, clutching my hand tighter. “Were there any signs? Any warnings? I–I shouldn’t be asking so many questions–”

“No.” I shake my head. “It’s okay, Rain. You can ask me anything now.”

Her eyes change. Despite being filled with sorrow and pity, there’s a light there now, one I’d hoped I would see tonight.

“And yes.” I nod. “She tried once before, and I saved her. I got her into therapy, and she was doing much better. But…she had a jealousy issue and just couldn’t shake it. And on her birthday, she saw me talking to one of my employees. She got in her car, drove here, and…”

My voice fades off as the memories of that night threaten to drag me back into despair. The sound of the rapids raging below seem somehow louder now than they did when we first arrived.

“I tried to find her, but she got here before me. There was nothing I could do.”

“Marlon, it’s not your fault. You know that, right?” Rain steps closer. Her warmth radiates out like a tiny sun. Her scent slides into my nostrils, and I breathe it into my lungs. “If she wanted to do that, she was going to find a way.”

I nod. “I’ve slowly been coming to terms with that. But as you may have guessed now, that’s why I had my rules in place with you. I was afraid that if I met another girl and gave my heart to her…that I’d lose her too. And that would break me forever.”

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