Page 36 of Forbidden Love

“I wish things were different. I’m so tired.”

“Me too, honey. Together, we’ll get through this.” Silence surrounds us for seconds before Clark holds up his finger with a smile on his face. “What do you say to a movie evening? I’m sure we’ll have some popcorn to pop. I’ll even let you pick the movie.”

I smile brighter than I’ve smiled in years. “Princess Diaries all the way.”

“Your wish is my command. Go get yourself comfortable and I’ll get us some snacks sorted.”

He helps me to stand up and places a kiss on my forehead. “I’ll be ten minutes.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

I watch him walking into his kitchen for a few moments before I turn and head back to my bedroom, where I hope the next few hours will give me a distraction from my thoughts and feelings.

Maybe doing something normal will be the best thing for me to do tonight. It has been years since the word ‘normal’ even entered my mind.

***

Light flooding in through the window stirs me out of a restful sleep. I feel arms wrapped around me, and my head is laying on a chest; the beating heartbeat is steady. Then I smell Clark’s familiar cologne. The woodsy smell is home.

“Good morning,” he croaks.

I try to sit up quickly, but pain shoots through my abdomen like someone just ripped me open.

“Ouch!” I cry out and lay my head back onto Clark’s chest.

“Shit. Are you okay?”

Clark’s panicked tone makes me lift my hand and cover his. It’s all I can do until I get my breath back. Everyone keeps telling me this pain will get better, but I’m losing the will to live.

“I thought I was doing the right thing letting you sleep cuddled into me. I’m so sorry. I forgot about your surgery.”

I roll gently over to my back and tears fall down my cheeks. I inhale slowly and carefully until I can breathe more normally.

“It’s not your fault. I needed sleep more.”

“Meds. I’ll get them.” He climbs off the bed in a hurry, but he’s careful not to jostle me in the process.

That’s the stark contrast between Clark and Colton. Clark cares about people. He would jump in front of a bus to save someone he doesn’t even know. That’s one thing I love about him.

“Here we go. Can I help you sit up?” He sits on the edge of the bed and offers me a hand to pull myself upright.

“Thank you.” He tucks one of his pillows behind me and hands me the pills and water. “I hoped this pain would get easier.”

“I know. Maybe we should get you checked over by a doctor.”

“Not today. I want today to be perfect for Daisy. I can’t deal with doctors today. Today is her day.”

Clark nods and stretches his back and arms out.

“You must be aching after lying in that position all night. The last thing I remember was us watching a film,” I say.

“You crashed out pretty quickly. And my aches will ease once I start moving. If you need anything at all today, please just ask one of us. We’re all here to help you.”

“I’m not used to having help, Clark, but I’ll try. I…” I shake my head. “I’m not looking forward to today. It becomes final, you know?”

He nods and takes my hand back in his. “I know what you mean, but just think of it like she’s coming home. You’ll be able to lay flowers, talk to her, visit her. I know it’s not the same as what you had planned for…” he trails off and studies me.

“I hadn’t planned for anything. I knew he’d find out she wasn’t a boy at some point. I knew life would be difficult. I tried to find a way to deal with bringing a daughter into this world, but there was nothing unless I could change her gender. I didn’t want to change her; she was my little girl. She was a part of me.”