Page 27 of Cruel Love

But I can’t do that to her again. I can’t leave without saying goodbye.

I drag my fingertip along her cheek, slowly traveling back toward her ear.

She opens her eyes. They look wide and alert like she didn’t sleep at all. For a brief second, her lips slide upward as she looks at me. Content and angelic. That glowing light in the darkness she’s always been for me.

“Hey,” I whisper.

“Hey...” She looks at the clock by the bed and her expression shifts. Just after six in the morning. “You’re leaving,” she says.

I nod. “Yeah.”

She sits up. “Without saying goodbye?”

I sit down beside her. “No, I learned my lesson about that last time.”

“Damn right, you did.”

Dani lets out a small, quiet chuckle. It feels nice to hear her laugh one last time. I don’t know when I’ll hear it again — or if I’ll hear it again.

Christ, what am I saying?

I’m coming back.

No matter what.

Dani rests her hands on my sides. “I should go with you.”

“No,” I whisper, leaning in for another hit of her sweet, apple smell.

“Fox, I can’t just stay here.”

“I know.” I release her hands to stand up.

She watches with a furrowed brow as I walk over to the collage of photos hanging on the wall. I take hold of the largest one and pull it off, revealing the hidden wall safe about halfway up the wall. I turn the dial, locking in the code from muscle memory, and the safe clicks open.

“Fox?”

I reach inside for the black canvas bag inside. When I turn, Dani’s already off the bed with her tank top on, stepping into a pair of shorts.

I set the bag on the bed, quickly zipping it open to get what’s inside. Dani crosses her arms as I pull out several stacks of cash, a few burner cellphones, and fake passports.

“It’s called a Code Zero kit,” I say. “In Snake Eyes, I mean.”

“What does that mean?” she asks.

“We all had one. If anything were to go wrong on a mission or we’d lost contact with HQ, we’d go into hiding and await further instruction.”

I pick up the stack of passports and flip open the first one. Mine. I slide it into my pocket. The second one is for Boxcar. The third, Caleb.

“When did you have all of this made, Fox?” she asks, her voice whispered and broken.

“Just after we came back from Iowa,” I answer truthfully.

“So, you’ve just been sitting around here, waiting for something like this to happen?”

“I was prepared for something like this to happen, Dani,” I say. “I didn’t want it to happen.”

She goes quiet.

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