Page 79 of Tainted Love

“Lucy—”

“Dante, I can’t close my eyes without seeing his.” I refuse to blink. “Don’t even try to tell me you don’t want to see him suffer as much as I do.”

“Of course, I do,” he says. “But I left that life behind when I brought you out here.”

“Then, teach me.”

He sits back and the light above us casts shadows over his eyes. “Lucy, you don’t want to be like me. You don’t want to do what I’ve done.”

“I want to take my life back.” I inhale to calm my shaking body. “I want to make sure I never feel this weak ever again.”

“I’ll take care of you, Lucy. I can protect you.”

“It’s not just about me,” I whisper. “Who knows what he’s done to other people or what he will do if we don’t stop him. I want to make sure he never makes anyone feel the way I do right now ever again.”

“I get it, Lucy. I do, but…” He sighs. “You kill him, another fool takes his place. You kill him and another one steps up. You can’t stop this from happening to someone else.”

“I don’t care about the next guy. He killed my father. He took my leg.”

“Lucy, this isn’t you and I don’t want it to be.”

“What am I supposed to be?” I ask. “Everything I was before is gone. I’ll never dance again.”

“You don’t know that.”

“But if I don’t, then what?” My shoulders twitch. “What do I do? Teach? Give lessons to children? Watch as they surpass me faster every year? I won’t do that, Dante. It’s too fucking hard.”

He leans forward. “You think killing a man is easy?” he asks.

“You’re telling me it’s not? Tell that to Spencer.”

“It was either him or you,” he says. “Would you rather I had chosen differently?”

“No,” I answer, shaking my head once. “But I saw it in your eyes, Dante. You killed him without a second thought.”

“I did that for you.”

“If you can do that then you can do this. Help me end him and we’ll move on.”

He shifts closer to me, lowering his voice to a firm growl. “What you’re asking… it’s not right.”

“I don’t care about right and wrong, Dante.”

“You will.”

“How can you — of all people — sit there and lecture me about morality?”

“I’m not.”

“Then, help me.”

“It’s not right… for you.”

I breathe through the frustration clogging my body. “I’ve spent my entire life doing what was right for me.” I plant my fingers on the table between us. “This is where it took me. It led me to you for a reason, Dante.”

“Not for this,” he whispers.

“I’m doing this with or without you.” I pause, forcing my tears away, preparing to say the words out loud to make them true. “He took everything from me. I want to kill him, Dante… and I want you to teach me how.”

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