Page 86 of Filthy Lawyer

I feel like such a fraud. I’m not cut out for this, you know. This wasyourdream, not mine.

Other Voice:

Keep it together and focus. You’re doing one hell of a job as a lawyer.

Elizabeth:

Real lawyers take the bar exam, Ellie.

Other Voice:

Shhh. Enough. Take out one of your cases and let’s talk about that.

Yes,let’s talk about that…

I picked up my phone and called Human Resources.

“Yes, Mr. Carter?” Marie answered on the first ring.

“Can you have an intern bring me Elizabeth Tanner’s file, please?”

“Which parts?”

“I want everything,” I said. “Her application, her bar exam results, her Harvard admissions letter and transcript. If you have a hair sample, I’ll take that, too.”

“We don’t keep hair samples here for anyone, Mr. Carter.”

“It was hyperbole.” I rolled my eyes. “Tell them the intern I need it as soon as possible.”

“The interns are off grabbing lunch for the associates.”

“Fine,” I said. “Have them bring it to me when they’re finished.”

Too impatient to wait, I called the private review line at Harvard’s admission office.

“This is Shanna Carlson at Harvard Admissions speaking, how may I help you?”

“Miss Carlson, this is Damien Carter with Hamilton & Associates,” I said. “I need to vet a graduate for our firm.”

“Of course you do.” There was a smile in her voice. “You guys always poach our best students. What’s the first and last name?”

“Elizabeth Tanner.”

The sound of her tapping the keyboard came over the line.

“Um…Can you spell it for me?”

I obliged, and she typed it again.

“Uh, do you have her student ID by chance?”

As if on cue, an intern slid a manila folder under my door.

“Yeah, give me one second.” I picked up the thin file, wondering if there was more to come. “It’s 6099-76-2673.”

“Ah, I see.” She let out a soft laugh. “Yes, we have that student on file asEllie Tanner. I see here in her file, she wrote one hell of an admissions essay about her twin sister, Elizabeth. I’m sure people confuse them all the time, huh?”

Twin?“Oh, I’m sure…”

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