Page 89 of Sin

And that did it.

My orgasm detonated so hard that my body jerked and my vision blacked out. I cried out London’s name as he swallowed my release, his heady eyes taking in just how much he’d wrecked me.

When he’d swallowed everything I had to offer, he finally let me slip from his mouth. He stared up at me with bliss-drunk eyes and reddened, swollen lips curved into a smile. “You didn’t finish.”

I almost laughed and teased him that I did, in fact, finish. But I knew what he wanted. So I swallowed, leaning my full weight against the bookshelf, and covered my eyes with one of my arms while I found my breath. “So what do you say?” I asked, not needing the book to remember how the poem ended. “Wanna get a little reckless with me?”

Gently, London tugged my arm away from my face. I hadn’t heard him move over my pulse in my ears. He helped me pull my clothes up. “Yes, Sin,” he said, voice still a little scratchy as he tucked me back inside my boxers. He held my stare. “I want to.”

“But?” I asked, sensing a but to his words and trying not to let him hear the hope and longing in my voice.

“But I’m scared. I don’t know how to let you in again,” he confessed, his voice cracking at the end. His hands slid along my still undone jeans. “Each time I have, you’ve wrecked me, Sin. And each time, like the fool I am, I forgive you, only to end up disappointed once again. I’m still so fucking angry and hurt. And I’m scared this will end up like the past and you’ll just end up leaving me. Again.”

“I didn’t want to leave you,” I argued. “It’s not like I wanted to go to prison.”

“Hard to truly believe that considering I gave you another option, Sin.”

“You wanted me to run away with you!” I shook my head, my fingers fisting in his shirt, both wishing we could go back to the post-orgasm bliss and relieved we were finally talking about this. “And what then? You would have lost everything, London! Your friends, your family, your business. Your fucking freedom! What sort of life would that have been? I couldn’t let you throw it all away for me.”

“But that should have been my decision! God, why can’t you still understand that? I knew exactly what I would have been giving up, and still, I would have given all of it up for you!” His chest heaved as he struggled to control himself. “I was ready to give it all up, Sin. Everything. Because the only thing I wanted, truly fucking wanted, was you.” His next words were filled with so much hurt and anger that they felt like a punch to the gut. “And you said no.”

Slowly, I pried my fingers from his shirt, letting them drop to my sides. “How could you have expected me to say yes? Do you truly believe that you wouldn’t have eventually grown to resent me if you lost everything for me? We would have always been on the run, always with a target on our backs. Do you really think you would have been happy?”

He turned his face away. “I guess we’ll never know because you never gave us the chance to try.”

“I didn’t want to risk you resenting me,” I whispered.

“Yeah, well, I think I started to anyway.”

“I’m sorry.” I didn’t really know what else to say or do.

He just sighed. “Yeah, I know. I want to let the past go, but sometimes it just pops up and then everything hurts all over again, you know?”

More than he knew.

He moved to cup my cheek, only to grimace when he realized his hand was still covered in his cum.

“Ugh, can we pick this conversation back up later? Because I really need a shower.”

I snorted a laugh because he wasn’t the only one. My dick was starting to stick uncomfortably against my skin. “Of course. Remember? Your pace.”

He looked so grateful in that moment that it was hard to feel disappointed.

Smiling warmly at me, he moved to the bookcase and… tugged on one of the books. There was a clicking sound just before the bookshelf swung forward to reveal several steps leading to what I assumed was his bedroom. Because London wouldn’t be London if he didn’t have a secret bookshelf passageway.

He glanced at me over his shoulder as he started for the stairs, noting how I hadn’t moved. Crossing the room back to me, he entwined our fingers and urged me up the couple of steps to the room beyond. “Come on. Let’s clean off and focus on getting some decent sleep in a decent bed. We have an early morning tomorrow, and then it’s more travel.”

I let him pull me into his room, unable to see much in the darkness. He tugged me into an en suite bathroom and flicked on the light. It was large with white, marble floors and dark blue cabinets. At the far end of the bathroom was a blue, mosaic-tiled walk-in shower with a large, circular shower head installed in the shower ceiling.

The real eye catcher, however, was the massive circular tub in the center of the room. Raised wooden slats wound around the base of the bathtub, making me curious of their purpose.

Wandering over to the tub, I let my fingertips glide over its rim. “That’s one fancy bath tub,” I said, peering into the massive circular basin.

“It’s a recent purchase,” London admitted, coming to stand beside me. “I actually haven’t gotten the chance to test it out yet.”

“Test it out?” I parroted, snorting. “It’s a bathtub, London. Not a car.”

He grinned before switching the faucet on. Testing the water with his fingers, London made a few adjustments. Then he sealed the drain. “It’s a bathtub which rotates the water through a heater beneath the slats, so the water stays the same temperature.”

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