I feel bad for her, I really do, but she picked a very unfortunate time to come here. There’s no doubt about it. I would embrace her in a tight hug if I wasn’t so afraid that I might lose control and devour her right here and now.
“So, I have to stay.” Mila looks resigned but unimpressed. “Well, that’s just great.”
“Is there anything I can do to make your time less shitty here?” I offer. “Anything at all?”
“I am starving,” she admits. “And I would like some of my own clothing from home. Elias knows where it is because he walked me there. Could you make that happen?”
I nod eagerly. That’s the bare minimum. “Of course I can do that for you. Anything else?”
Her eyes meet mine and without saying anything, she lets me know that she’s still thinking of me, wanting me, just like I do her. She hasn’t calmed down over the night, either. Holy shit, what the hell are we going to do? How are we going to be around one another with all of this?
“Right,” I say as I swallow hard. “Well, I will communicate with Elias now. Make sure that someone is here to keep an eye on you from the outside of the cabin, and head out.”
“Are you sure? This isn’t too much trouble?”
“Hey, Mila, we’re holding you hostage here,” I joke. “It’s the least I can do.”
I back away, but it’s agonizing. Like breaking the most powerful magnetic bond I have ever experienced in my life. My God, no wonder I’m utterly addicted to her. I can barely keep the way her body felt, so small and soft underneath mine, out of my head. But she is already mate bonded with Elias, as far as I can tell. Or there is something there between them anyway. I don’t know for sure, so I probably should cut this off now. Although, it’s easier said than done.
I try to push it all into a little box in the back of my brain though, while I shift back into my wolf form so I can communicate with Elias. I know he already said that Mila lives on Faraway Lane, so I basically know where to go, but I need his directions.
‘What are you doing?’ Elias demands. ‘What are you looking for?’
‘Mila needs clothing. I figure we can at least try to make her comfortable.’
I’m met with silence for a beat too long. Nerves zig zag through my body as I pad through the forest, waiting for my alpha to accept what I’m doing. If there really is something there between himself and Mila, and he cares a lot about her, surely he wants her to be comfortable as well?
It seems weird that he’s even debating this, going over it back and forth. I truly don’t know what’s happening here, but I’m all on edge. Nervous as all hell. If I get nothing, then I know that Elias is furious with me, and we might be about to get into it…
Finally, and thankfully, he reels off the address. I start making my way there. I can still sense my heart absolutely pounding in my chest, with every pound of my pulse all for Mila. Shit, even though I know I can’t have her, she really has gotten under my skin, hasn’t she? What am I going to do? How can I make any of this easier for myself? We have so much going on. We don’t need more. We don’t need an internal fight on top of everything else.
I kinda want to talk about this to someone, but the only other person I can picture opening up to is Liam. He’s so open and understanding about everything. He’s the one person I shouldn’t feel embarrassed about talking to, but I do, regardless.
Bringing up mating bonds with another male wolf isn’t exactly like asking about the weather. I suppose other guys might have talked about it, but it just feels a little weird to me.
I can’t imagine being that vulnerable with another person, even a fellow wolf, but I might have to. I don’t know if I can keep holding on to this information. It might eat me alive.
I feel a little grim-faced when I reach Mila’s home, but all of that floats away the moment I step into her space and inhale her deep, intoxicating scent. Holy shit, this is almost as powerful as actually being with her. Everything within this space is all her. Just her.
It feels very intrusive to be going through all her belongings and touching her things. I know she’s given me permission to do so, but still… it’s intimate and crazy. I find my fingers edging to her underwear drawer, knowing she’s definitely going to want some clean panties but melting inside as I do. How can I look at her lacy g-string without picturing her beautiful pert butt poking out of it? My blood is burning hot and tearing through my body at the speed of light.
It's almost like she’s becoming a part of me. That our bond is tightening even without her here. Can Mila really be mate bonded with Elias when it feels like this with me? I don’t know if I have ever been so certain of anything in my entire life. It burns through me powerfully, almost knocking me off my feet because I’m so sure. I’m usually a very decisive person, which is why I find it so easy to work alongside Elias, but this is the clearest choice ever.
I want Mila. I want her to be mine. I don’t know how to stop feeling this way. I really don’t think it’s even possible. Can a man turn off red hot lust just like that? What about the feeling that someone is meant to be mine? I don’t think I can get rid of that ever.
If this feeling continues, I will have to have a scary outright conversation with Mila too, so I can work out how she is feeling.
I start to get dizzy as I gather up everything I think she might need. It’s hard for me to remain on my feet because of all of this, and I’m not done yet. More importantly, I need to get Mila something to eat, because I could almost feel the sensation of her stomach growling. I don’t want to explain to her that I’m late because I lost my mind in her house.
Speedily, so I don’t crumble more, I get a bag of Mila’s belongings and a bunch of food as well to take back to the cabin with me. I really hope that this is enough to make her time with us just a little more comfortable. The cabin isn’t much bigger than the apartment she has, but it’s definitely not as comfortable or homely. No wonder she wants to go back.
“What are you doing here?” I ask Amos as I find him on the couch in the cabin. “I thought that you were with Elias getting your mission. He hasn’t locked you up, too, has he? I thought he would have you running around in circles to help us find The Rift.”
Amos chuckles. “Nah, this is where he wants me. At the cabin all the time so Mila isn’t ever on her own.” We both pause to hear her walking around upstairs. “I guess he wants to make sure that he can keep an eye on me as well. Just like you said, he wasn’t happy with me.”
I cock a knowing eyebrow. “You got yelled at, huh? I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes, that’s for sure.”
“Oh yeah, big time. But then he gave me my mission.” Amos smirks, looking overly pleased with himself for my liking. “So now I have to be here twenty-four-seven, so Mila always has a wolf in her bed. Not bad for a mission, am I right?”