Page 36 of Bond & Protect

“Yeah, but sometimes things are hard. I don’t know what else we can do. I don’t want to let pride get in the way of something good happening, you know? I just want to get this solved.”

I feel selfish now as he says this, but we’ve all gotten in the habit of pushing our negative emotions away quickly so the monsters don’t have anything to feast on. We just want them to stay on the other side of The Rift so they don’t come near us again, but it’s hard. It’s a struggle when we have so much on our minds. We can’t relax just yet.

“Is that Amos?” Elias rises to his feet, so I do the same thing. “Oh God, what’s happened?”

I’m struck with the same icy cold feeling as well. There’s definitely something wrong. His wolf is padding toward us so quickly I don’t know what to do. I know I’m freaking out, though. Elias shifts so we can communicate in our special wolf way, so again I do the same.

I hate the way the monsters obnoxious words flow through me again.

‘You think that you have chosen to be quieter and more logical. You assume that’s your choice. That everything is your choice, but that isn’t the case. That hasn’t ever been the case, for your whole life’. I don’t want to ever think about what it said to me, because I know it was just to crush my spirits, but the words keep hitting me regardless. ‘But you are a pushover, and that’s who Elias has molded you to be. He has always overpowered you and made you look small and stupid. He’s always stepped on you, and made you feel stupid for your ideas. You know this, deep in your core, you know this.’ A chill tears down my spine. It sickens me. ‘The others in your pack all know about this as well, Sydney, which is why they laugh at you behind your back. The pack elders as well. Everyone thinks of you as an embarrassment. They want you out of the pack, but they feel too sorry for you to actually do it. It’s all pity.’

Then it gets worse, I recall what the beast said to Mila as well while I was knocked out on the floor. ‘Sydney is dead as well, but he’s only second best anyway. You never really cared about him. He was just there. He was just a virgin like you who made it easier for you. It made the whole experience less embarrassing. Don’t think I don’t see right through you.’

I don’t believe that about Mila, she isn’t the sort of person to do that to anyone, to see another person as second best, but it still makes me feel weird. I don’t know how to take it. This is what worries me… that I will never be able to shake off what happened on that night.

The more the monsters attack me, the more of myself I risk.

Yeah, we really do need the other wolves here to fight, to get out on the front line, and to make sure nothing like this ever happens again. I don’t want to lose myself to those fears and to never be able to fully love Mila like I want to. Because I can’t love myself.

By the time I’m in my wolf, I’m trying my hardest not to feel the power of those words, but they surge through me regardless. I can’t stop myself from really feeling them.

‘It’s The Rift guys,’ Amos announces, much to my dismay. ‘It definitely isn’t sealed. I don’t know what we’re going to do but we need to close it more than it is. The monsters seem to be pushing against it from the other side, determined to burst through.’

Elias glances my way. ‘I need to find Theo, now. We can’t put it off any longer. Can you three keep trying to seal The Rift as much as you can and I will see what I can do?’

I don’t want to go anywhere near that thing, but I nod anyway because this is what we need to do. Just as I feared, the fight isn’t over yet. We still have a lot more work to do. Our happy ever after isn’t going to come just yet. But if I’m patient and do what I can to hold myself together, I will get there. We all will. As long as we stick together. Unity, right?

‘What’s happening?’ Amos demands as we run back to The Rift. ‘Who is Theo?’

I wait until we’re back with Liam too before I explain what the plan is. Both of them seem as tentative as me about the idea of bringing in a bunch of other wolves, but we all know that Elias has his head screwed on. He wouldn’t do this if it wasn’t something he was sure would offer us help. He has to be certain before he does something so strong.

‘So, we’re about to be overrun, huh?’ Liam asks wryly. ‘With wolves that might hate us because of fighting that happened, what? Centuries ago? Who the hell knows. And we’re worrying about the monsters now? There might be internal fighting.’

I nod along in agreement. ‘Yeah, but it might be the unity that we so desperately need.’

That shuts Liam’s worries up. He nods too, as we all soak this in. We’re just going to have to find a way to work together, no matter what it takes. We have to.

‘Look, there it is!’ Amos draws my attention to a shimmering line starting to appear once more. It’s only faint and it doesn’t last forever, but it’s scary. ‘This is what I mean. This is what I’m worried about. I think this is going to burst open at any moment.’

We all think only positive thoughts, trying to fight off the potential monsters. Amos also nips at The Rift as if this is going to help. I even try and slice it with the blade but nothing makes any difference. The Rift continues to shimmer in and out of focus for a while.

“I think I’m the one who needs that blade.” I shouldn’t be quite as relieved as I am when I hear Mila’s voice because she’s potentially in danger here now, but I am. She really is the one we need to make this work. After all, the blade belongs to her. “Pass it over, Sydney.”

She takes it from me with a renewed sense of energy. I can almost feel it rolling off of her in endless waves. She must have slept well and is feeling ready to tackle this once more.

“Mom is still at my apartment,” she tells us as she slashes at The Rift every single time it comes into view. She definitely has more of an effect on it than the rest of us. “She’s sleeping. So tired after everything that she’s been through. Yesterday must have really taken it out of her. But I think she’s in a good frame of mind as well. I think she’s happy to know that I’m happy. Even if she’s worried about me fighting these monsters. I think she will always worry about that. Although, she doesn’t need to. I know that I want to fight. To be here with you all.”

I don’t even notice Liam shifting back into his human form before he starts talking. “I think you should know, Mila, that this might be about to get a lot bigger because we need to get other wolves to come. We need others to fight alongside us so we can find a way to close The Rift for good. The monsters are still trying to get to us, and we need to stop it.”

Mila’s face screws up in an unimpressed expression. Understandably so because I think we all feel that way. Our lives are about to get harder before they get easier.

“That should be interesting,” she comments. “I might have to make sure my mom goes back to the city and her life and that we meet in the middle when we see one another because I don’t want her to end up in danger here. It’s going to be a nightmare.”

“You don’t want to leave as well?” Liam cocks his head to one side curiously. “Just for a little while to keep yourself as safe as you can?”

Instantly, she shakes her head no. “Hell no, what sort of unity is that? I’m going to be there with you every step of the way.”

Her smile lights me up and makes me feel a whole lot better about this. It is scary, there’s no denying that, but we’re going to make it. We’re going to fight this, and one way or another, we will win. We have to. We have way too much for the monster to take away from us.

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