Page 65 of Veiled Yearning

Now that a battle is imminent, I can’t seem to do enough to prepare.

Doubts haunt me, splinters jabbing at unexpected moments. Have I made enough weapons? Will the shields hold? Will my friends go into battle expecting the items I made to help, but end up being let down?

Will I be responsible for someone I care about dying?

This fear. I keep trying to tamp it down, but it’s so hard. It’s not just fear for myself—though I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified of Nicolas—but everyone else.

The most terrifying question comes to me in my sleep. What if Nicolas captures me, and this plan of his works?

I had to pry the whole story from Gavril; he didn’t want to tell me, but I pushed until he finally gave in. Stony-faced, he recalled the vision to me—Nicolas insisting I’m the key to his success, his plan to kill all the Sentinels so I’m left alone and vulnerable.

The thought of that happening is beyond horrifying. Gavril killed, because of me?

It can’t happen.

Once Gavril told me, panic ballooned inside me, squeezing out all the air from my lungs. Terrible possibilities whirled through my head, each one worse than the last.

Then I plucked one solution from the tangle of thoughts, whispering, “If I leave, there’s no reason to hurt you. If I’m—”

“He’s not going to get you,” Gavril retorted firmly. “I won’t let him.”

“But.” Nicolas is so powerful. He’s been stealing vampires’ abilities for years. Even as strong as Gavril is, what if Nicolas is too much for him?

“Gav.” I clutched his hands. “I can’t let you be hurt. Any of you. Maybe it's better if I leave. Hide out alone. So you won't be in danger. And if he comes for me... I won't let him. I'll take myself out of it—”

Gavril recoiled, his expression aghast. “No. No, Chiara. Never. Don’t even suggest that.” Then he pulled me onto his lap, his arms shaking as he embraced me, and told me fiercely, “Never. Just don’t… I can’t lose you. I can’t. I won’t allow it.”

Then he held me for the next five minutes, his heart thundering loud enough for me to hear it, alternating between kissing me and repeating things like I won’t let him hurt you and I need you and never say that again.

I wasn’t exactly crazy about the idea myself, so I let that one go quickly. Even though I still feel horribly guilty every time I think about someone being injured or killed because of Nicolas’s obsession with me.

If not for Gavril, I’d be having panic attacks every day.

But Gavril seems to always know how to calm me down, and he does it in a way that doesn’t make me feel uncomfortable or weak.

He’ll just take me aside without explanation, asking me to join him somewhere private for a bit. Then we’ll sit in the library and do something that isn’t Custodian-related—talking about books, playing a game, or he might have a small gift for me, like another carved animal or knick-knack to add to my collection. And we never leave the room without cuddling and kissing until everything else disappears except us.

It’s not just the private times, though. When we’re sitting in a meeting, Gavril will hold my hand, or rub my neck, or lean over to kiss my cheek. They’re just small things—as one of the leaders of the Sentinels, he can’t exactly spend all his time comforting me—but each time he touches me, I feel better.

Who would have thought it? Back when Gavril showed up at my cabin, this was the last thing I ever considered.

Me. Falling in love. Finding the one man I’d do absolutely anything for.

And if I have to sacrifice myself to keep him safe, I’ll do it without hesitation. For all his rough edges and gruff demeanor, Gavril is the kindest man I’ve ever known. And the bravest. He brings good to this world, and I won’t let Nicolas hurt him.

“Chiara.”

Gavril’s rumbly voice breaks into the silence, and I let out a little yip of surprise.

“Sorry.” He crosses the solarium, his features creasing in apology. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

I sternly command my nerves to settle as I stand up to greet him. It’s one thing being jumpy about Nicolas and the Custodians, but in Gavril’s house, where I’ve painstakingly shielded every last inch of it? I feel a little foolish.

That’s not even taking into account the veritable army that’s staying here now. Over the last few days, all the Sentinels have gathered at Gavril’s home in Manchester, along with a number of our friends and allies. There’s Larkin, Frederick and Cait, Knight, Lucas, Sam, David and Raine, Alex and Jules, Roman and Grace, and Ethan and Ivy.

If I can’t feel safe surrounded by fifteen other vampires, I have a real problem.

“It’s fine.” I smile at Gavril. “I was just caught up in my thoughts.”

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