Page 4 of Roses for Rosie

“Hello, this is Adam Smythe. Please connect me to your event manager.”

“Adam Smythe? Yeah right. That’s a good one.” The voice on the other end of the phone has the audacity to laugh at me.

“No really, I am Adam Smythe and I need to talk to someone about a date for a reading event.”

“If you’re Adam Smythe, then I’m Taylor Swift.”

“I don’t care what you want to call yourself. I need to talk to your manager.”

“Who put you up to this? I bet it was Susie. I can’t believe she did this.”

“No one put me up to anything. I am Adam Smythe and I need to speak to your manager.”

“OK, I’ll play along. Mr. Smythe, how nice to hear from you. I’d be happy to help you with your event. The first thing I’ll need to know if what color teddy you would like me to wear for your pre-event personal performance. We offer a complimentary pole dance on the spiral staircase leading to our upper balcony which of course I will be performing myself.”

“Miss…”

“It’s Rosie. As I was saying, I would be happy to throw in a little extra one-on-one service for you, Mr. Smythe. I’ve seen your picture on the back of your book and it is simply yumalicious. Before we get back to planning your event, I have a secret to share with you. I fell asleep last night with you gazing at me from my nightstand. I stripped off every stitch of clothing and gave you quite a show. I can’t wait to do it in person.”

“I can’t imagine…”

“You need me to spell it out for you? First, I’ll strut out from the storage room in my teddy. Black, yes, I think you are a black teddy type of guy and I’ll make love to the pole in my dance. I will wrap my leg around it and slide up and down making sure everything is nice and slippery. I can hear the thump of the bass playing in the background as I grind myself on that pole. Use your imagination a bit, Mr. Smythe. I bet you can hear it too. Can you see me in your mind’s eye?”

Actually, I can see her and I’m getting hard just listening to her. This woman is clearly mad, but I like the way her mind works. I wonder if she’s as wild in the bedroom as she is over the phone or if she would get all shy in person. Teasing her until this dirty side comes out could make a trip to Jamesville worthwhile.

I could take notes and use this charade in my next book, but I reach down and stroke myself instead. I don’t know who she thinks she’s talking to, but I’m not above enjoying her mistake.

“Then what?”

“Then I would get up close and personal, Mr. Smythe. I’m thinking a lap dance would be in order. I can see the bulge in your pants from watching me fuck the pole and we can’t have you reading to the group in that condition. That teddy would have to go, obviously. I would shed that and give you a real show.

“Once I’m fully naked, I would climb on top of you, kneeling over you and lower myself inch by inch onto you. Yes, you are allowed to touch now. I know you want to caress my breasts. They are right there, bobbing in front of your face after all. Go ahead and touch them. My nipples are already hard and waiting for you. While you’re busy there, I’ll be unbuttoning your pants and letting the anaconda free.

“Then we’ll grind it out, Mr. Smythe. Me on top, in control. If I just happen to shift the wrong way and you slip inside me, I’m sure you won’t mind. Would you?”

Would I mind? No as a matter of fact, I don’t think I would. The faceless temptress has me as hard as a rock in my office. This call isn’t turning out to be nearly the chore I thought it would be.

“I wouldn’t mind,” I choke out.

“Good. It’s all part of the service here at Nooks and Books, Mr. Smythe. Is there anything else I can do for you today?”

“Actually, yes, I really do still need to talk to your manager about setting up this reading event.”

“Game’s over, man. It’s been fun. Tell Susie I said hi.”

“Really, I swear I don’t know Susie and this isn’t a game. I really am Adam Smythe and I do need to plan an event in your establishment.”

Silence rings out on the other side of the phone.

“Hello. Are you still there?” I ask. I look at the screen of my cell. The call hasn’t disconnected. She must still be on the other end. “Miss?”

“No,” she mutters. “No, no, no.” Anguish drips from her voice. Ah, she is realizing her mistake now.

“Yes, actually. Are you the person I will be working with to plan this event.”

A tiny ‘yes’ comes through the line.

“Excellent then. Which days are free on your calendar?”

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