Page 12 of All the Promises We Break

That was one of the few times in our history I was his true wingman. I had to sort out what he needed before he needed it so I could see eventually he’d be okay. When everything in those first hours wasn’t working, I called Hayley. There’s a magic between them I’ve unfortunately not seen often.

Her hand is still resting in the middle of my chest when she finishes. As the horn is sounding for the end of the second period, without thinking I start drawing circles on the back of her hand, light tiny little circles. I don’t know if this was a club I should have asked to join before diving in, but it just feels right.

I watch through her long lashes to see if she looks up. She does. I wait for her to pull her hand away or tell me to stop. She doesn’t. Instead, Hayley curls under her arm, rotating her body until she’s laying down with her head on my thigh. Her left hand still stays on my chest. My finger keeps drawing the circles in all forms.

Her hair falls all around between us. Over her shoulder, in my lap. A few strands even settle over my chest. I can feel her shoulders gently shake. Hayley isn’t one to cry often, but when she does it’s a very personal thing for her. I don’t ask her if she’sokay. I already know that answer. I don’t try to talk at all. I keep drawing the circles over and over.

In an odd way, it feels calming to me. I should be better in these situations. I’m not. At all. Right now, what I can do, what I am doing, is enough.

Hayley

I end up in that weird state between totally asleep and totally awake. I love that space. That’s where the best dreams can be had.

I’m lying warm in the arms of a beautiful man. We’re under the stars. His muscles are felt on every part of my body. My cheek is against his chest. His shirt feels like a soft pillowcase with his pecs being the best pillow ever.

His cologne smells like a mix of the woods we’re in with another scent I can’t describe. I just know I love it. Every time I inhale, my lungs fill with it. I know I won’t ever forget that smell. The denim of his jeans weaves against mine. Our legs are all gently twisted together like a pretzel.

My hands are pressed flat against his chest. They rise and fall with every breath he takes. I could stay with him forever, just like this. Then I hear what sounds like a horn in the distance. However, the distance becomes less and less as the sound intensifies.

My eyes flutter open. I didn’t realize I’d fallen asleep. It was light when I got here, now the sky is quickly going from golden orange to the purple of early night. Before I’m fully aware, I can’t help but smile thinking about my dream. Good ones have been few and far between since Eli’s accident.

A barely-there snore rattles beneath my cheek. The darkness of a commercial leads to the light of the ice in the hockey game on television. That light lets me in on a little secret. My dream was only partially a dream.

I am in someone’s arms. My hands are against someone’s chest. Someone is my intoxicating pillow. My legs are in a vine pattern. The someone is not a fantasy. In reality, I wake up to Wes and I curled up face-to-face, holding each other while we slept.

Holy shit.

Okay, think. Quick think. What happened?

I was talking about Eli. I rested my head on his lap, then…nothing. How did we end up in each other’s arms like this? Did he pull me in?

My head continues to churn as he begins to stir. His breathing is so soft. The five o’clock shadow from his chin glides across my forehead. The cologne in my head is his. That smell of the deep woods with the subtle hint of all man is something I’ve never noticed about him.

His legs slide along mine at a snail’s pace. I remember telling him I was frozen earlier. I’m beyond that now. I’m petrified. His eyes flutter open as his arms stretch tighter around me. I watch as the sense of realization washes over him that I’ve been living with for the last few minutes.

Like me, he doesn’t move. We’re left staring at each other in a way we never have. His eyes are lusty and dark. His hands fit perfectly over my spine. My hands that have been used to a steady pace beneath his skin now feel an increased beat.

He lifts his left hand from my back and begins to make tiny circles along my jawline. My eyes close in complete contentment. He circles from my right ear all the way down to my chin. He pauses there, drawing an infinity symbol over and over again. Wes allows his finger to slide under my chin. Heallows himself inside this bubble we’ve created and presses his lips to mine.

I’ve never once wondered what it would be like to kiss him. I never had a crush on him as a young teenager. He usually annoys the crap out of me at any given moment, except this one. His lips are so soft and tender. They make me forget who he is and where we are. I want this taste.

He isn’t rough with me. He isn’t in some sort of feral attack mode that I’d thought would be how he operates. He’s gentle and kind. He’s holding the back of my head with his hand like I’m a precious piece of glass.

Wow.

He allows the kiss to trail off. When his lips pull away, I’m left with the confusion of what just happened and how I feel about it.

I open my mouth to spout a thousand questions, but nothing comes out. A line in the sand has been crossed or completely washed away. I’m left with choices. I can fall back off the couch to gain some distance. I could kiss him again, because holy shit. I remain suspended like the dreamlike state I prefer.

“How was your nap?” he whispers.

“Ummm, good. I, uh, don’t remember falling asleep.”

“Neither do I. Game must have been boring.”

“Wes?”

“Yeah?”

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