Page 68 of Harbor in the Tempest

We both keep an eye on the surgical timer. One of the nurses came to explain this to us. On the wall in the corner is a large monitor. With this monitor, you can see where your loved one is and what stage they are in. If they’re being prepped, you’ll see it. When they’re brought to the operating room, the code will change, and the clock will start. When they finish, the board will update to recovery.

The instant the board switches Eli’s status to the operating room, Jack comes over to rest his hands over Lily’s shoulders. The clock begins its painfully slow tick upward. First by the second, then by the minute, and finally by the hour. After the hour mark, I can’t sit still anymore.

I give a small smile to Lily before I gently slide my hand free to walk away over toward the windows. My instinct when I have nervous energy is always to dance. If I leap high enough, turn fast enough, slice through the air hard enough, nothing will win but me.

I hold on to the windowsill and stare out. Without thinking, I begin my warm-up routine as if I was on the ballet bar. I roll out my right ankle first, then the left. I bend and flex at the knee to loosen them up. I rise to pointe in my tennis shoes and back down again. Over and over. I center myself in fifth position, rolling my neck slowly counterclockwise.

“Is ballet where your heart is?”

My head comes to center position then I look to my left. Eli’s grandmother, Evelyn, is standing next to me. “Not completely. I did years of it growing up. I prefer contemporary, hip-hop, and lyrical. Not necessarily in that order. I’m supposed to have an audition for a company at the end of the week.”

“Congratulations. That’s exciting. I took some ballet lessons in my younger days too. Andrew and I do some ballroom on occasion.”

I smile. “Eli told me. He asked me to teach him a few things that I do. I assumed he’d never danced before. So, I showed him. I put on a little music one night in my loft and he took me in hold. I was in total shock, especially when he started doing reverse turns. He’s really quite good. Eli told me that between you and his mother, he could fox-trot and waltz by the age of eight. He was always surprising me.”

“And he will again.”

“I want to believe that.”

“Then do. There is one inevitable truth about all Sawyer men.”

“What’s that?” I ask.

“They never give up.”

Andy walks over to give Evie a kiss on her cheek. “They’ve just changed the board. Eli’s in the recovery phase. Hopefully, we’ll have an update soon.”

She smiles so wide her eyes nearly disappear. “See what I mean?”

I nod, but when I’m alone, before I return to the leather pod, I take in two huge breaths and let them go. One is for me.He made it.The other is for him.Keep breathing.

I wind my neck back and forth in my hands as I take my seat next to Hayley. She reaches over with her right hand and takes mine. I feel something cold and hard against my skin. I flip our hands over to see the Sawyer crest on her thumb.

“When did you get that?”

“They mentioned to Dad it was in Eli’s belongings. He asked to have it. My father was going to put it in his pocket. I wanted to wear it instead for luck and a connection to Eli.”

“I get it.”

The heavy doors open again as Dr. Collier emerges from behind them. She’s tugging on the cap over her head that hid her hair. She’s balling it up in her hand as she approaches us.

“Hello, everyone. Are we all here?”

Wes tries to keep it light. “Physically, yes.”

“I’ll take it. So, Elijah had one more small seizure just prior to us starting. It came and went quickly so we were able to proceed. For those who weren’t here earlier, we drilled two small holes into Eli’s skull. From those two holes we were able, with guidance from imagery, to drain the blood that was causing the pressure in his brain.

“We’re cautiously optimistic we won’t have to do anything more invasive. It might take him quite a while to wake up. Once we’re convinced his vitals are stable, we’ll move him out of recovery and back into the ICU.”

“What are things we have to watch for?” I ask.

“That’s a good question. We decided to remove his breathing tube after surgery. We’ll continue to monitor his oxygen levels, blood pressure, and the pressure in his head. We’ve added an antibiotic to his IV as a precaution in case of infection.”

“When will he wake up?” Lily questions.

“Eli will wake in his own way and in his own time. I wish I could set a timer for you. This is a trauma unlike anything he’s experienced. He might have holes in his memory or lose time. He might not act or react like he used to. Try not to make too much of it for his sake or your own.”

Eli remains in recovery for a couple of hours before he’s transferred back to the Intensive Care Unit. As much as we all want to see him right away, we have to go in shifts. I don’t mind going last. Everyone asked if I wanted to go first. I don’t feel like I deserve to.

---