Page 51 of Cross To Bear

“Did he find the good spot?” Crash asked, whispering directly into my ear, his fingers finding my clit again and giving it a little pinch. “You think you’re feeling good now. You wait until you feel our baculums. They’ll lock down inside you, tugging on that spot with each stroke, driving you out of your fucking mind.”

He didn’t need to tell me; I could see it on the horizon, like an undiscovered country. I was still learning its geography, but I was an apt student. I moved then, in barely perceptible little bounces, in time with their strokes, the blue light of the screen washing over my face. I felt needy and messy and just a little dirty, and radiant with pleasure. I rode that wave higher and higher, even though I knew I’d never make it over the edge.

“Crash…” I leaned over almost drunkenly, my mouth hovering over his. Hawk’s fingers still worked lazily in and out of me, setting up a terrible ache, though not one he could satisfy.

“Something you need?”

That fucking smirk, I wanted to claw it off his face, but I knew he was the ringleader in all of this.

“Crash, please.”

“Please what, Maddie?”

“Please, I need—”

“I know what you need and you will, when I’m ready.”

“No, now, Crash, please.”

My hands shook as I reached for his zipper, dropping my head down. If I sucked him off, surely—

“That’s not how this is gonna go, Maddie.” His eyes bored into mine. “We’re in control until you say otherwise.” His expression was deadly serious, all of that mocking edge gone. “Until you say stop. Are you ready to stop?”

How did anyone mistake Crash for human? He looked entirely alien right now, the flickering light of the screen playing over his sharp bone structure, making his eyes glow even brighter. There was none of the smiling joker here now, just someone gazing into my eyes with an intensity no man had ever matched.

“Are you ready to stop, Maddie?” His hand went to my cheek, stroking the slope there. “I’m there if you are and I’m there if you aren’t. You just have to say you’re done with this and I’ll stop the games.”

But I couldn’t, could I? That was the seductiveness of each and every one of them. They seemed to know exactly what would push my buttons. I was hovering on the edge of an abyss that was filled with pleasure, and Crash was asking if I was ready to jump off, because he’d catch me every time. I couldn’t, couldn’t say no, stop, I’m done. Take his hand or my own and just flick my clit hard and fast until I shattered. I sucked in breath after breath, my brows creasing as a war waged inside me.

Because if I admitted defeat, there was something else that came with it. Not just that I needed him and Hawk right now, but that I needed…

“I’m not ready.” I whispered that, barely audible over the sound of the movie. “I’m not ready, Crash. I can’t–”

He surged forward, kissing me to stop any further words, but when he pulled away he fished out his wallet with a grin. Then he dropped it on the floor with a theatrical air.

“Oops. Guess I’ll have to pick that up.”

I watched him slip from his chair into the space between the seats, unable to look away for a second. Hawk’s fingers pushed deeper, harder, setting up a terrible rhythm as Crash kneeled before me. His big hands smoothed up my skirt, right as he looked up.

“You’re in control,” he said in a hoarse whisper. “Remember that. No matter how it seems, you’re the one running the show.” His eyes dropped down as he flipped my skirt up, groaning at what he saw. “I’m just the fucking monkey dancing to your tune.”

I wanted to know what that meant, ask questions, but he was done talking, lunging forward and silencing me with one flick of his tongue. Again and again, he licked that sensitive nub, forcing my whole body to jolt in time with his caresses. As my hands slapped down on his hair, tangling in those long silken strands, I couldn’t have felt less in control.

And I hadn’t since I found out about their true interest in me.

The sleuth kept saying I was the one calling the shots, but as Crash forced me higher, Hawk tilted my head his way.

“How does he make you feel?” he asked, his mouth hovering over mine as his fingers worked harder, deeper. “What does it feel like as he licks you. Tell me, Maddie. Is this what you want?”

“Yes…” The word hissed out of me without thought.

“Are we what you want?”

Those dark gold eyes studied mine, catching every tiny little response, so it came as no surprise to him when I blurted this out.

“Yes!”

It was dragged out of me, this admission, partly because the pulse of lust throbbed so violently inside me and partly because of something else entirely. That feeling of being safe, even while doing something patently unsafe. It was like riding behind Crash on a motorcycle. At any point I could fall off, the wheels could hit a slick puddle of water and jerk out from under us, sending us skidding across the asphalt. I’d seen the statistics, knew how risky it was, but when I was sitting on the pillion seat, I didn’t care. I just clung on tight and…

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