Page 93 of See Me After Class

“Promise me, El.”

“Anything, my love.”

“That when you remember me, it will be with mostly joy, and maybe sometimes, a little bit of sadness.”

I’d resisted her words at first. “Don’t talk that way. You know you’re gonna make it. We have the best doctors working round the clock for you. You have to?—”

“Sally is going to do just fine. You’ll see. She’s a strong girl. But I need you to remember to live too.”

“I can’t do it without you, June. I can’t.”

“You’ll never be without me. You won’t see me, not in the sense you’re used to, but the love—that can’t ever go. It’ll be there in your heart, reminding you of every good thing in this world.”

That alone had cost her a bout of coughing.

“Hush. Rest now.”

“Let everything happen to you. Feel all your feelings. And remember, life... life is the most beautiful gift of all.Here, at the very end, I see that now.”

My throat felt like someone had punched it. Raw, harsh, cold, all at the same time.

I almost hit a tree, but swerved at the very last second.

June had asked me to live in honor of her memory.

And yes, I enjoyed it. I meant to cherish all of it, so that when I’d go, I’d go out guns blazing.

It didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt at times. I didn’t want to go through this life alone.

But no matter how many dates I went on after her, no one made me feel warm.

And without the warmth, it was only ever sex.

Which was why part of me had agreed to this ridiculous online thing. Maybe I’d learn something from it.

Hell, maybe I’d teach some things too. Different from Shakespeare and Proust, of course.

I was sure the ladies at Naughty Lessons did not need a lecture onA Midsummer Night’s Dreamor why I feltRebecca’s heroine was also the antagonist.

Or maybe I’d prove myself wrong and find something meaningful. Who knew?

Come what may, it was Sally and me for now. Until I came across someone worthy of my daughter’s love, I’d remain this way. Floating along.

And that was okay too.

It wasn’t what June would have wanted, but then again, losing her wasn’t what I’d wanted, either.

Life had this habit of tossing out surprises at every curve. And maybe that was what made it fun.

I parked my Jeep and stepped out, walking toward East Harbor.

This place. It could be my downfall, or it could be the grounds of justice, too.

A courtroom for getting even.

For now, I took a moment to bask in its beauty.

The stone-walled, Gothic-style university was a breathtaking sight to behold.