Page 43 of Thirty Days in Paris

But would Olivier understand? Or would he judge her? She still wasn’t sure of the part she had played in her own downfall.

‘Then why did you come to find me?’

It was a fair question.

‘I don’t know. I had lunch with Nathalie. There was wine. I wanted to see you …’

She went to reach her hands out to touch his, but pulled them back just in time.

‘Nathalie.’ His face brightened at the mention of her name. ‘We lost touch. She was a good friend to me. When you disappeared, I was a mess. She helped me a lot. She always said one day you would come back.’ He gave a wry smile. ‘Kind of a little late, though.’

‘Oh.’ Disappointment dug a sharp little knife into her ribs.

Olivier just looked at her. ‘It is a shame. We were so in love. When you left, I dreamed of you every night. For years.’

Juliet stirred some sugar into her espresso while she found the courage to ask the next question.

‘But you found someone, in the end?’

‘I did,’ he said with a sigh. ‘Emma, my wife, came from New York to work at my father’s company. She fell in love with France. With Paris. With me, apparently.’ Juliet detected a trace of bitterness in his voice. ‘We got married here – all her family came. It was perfect.’ He gave a shrug. ‘We got a beautiful apartment in the Fifth. We had good friends, great dinners, weekends on the Côte d’Azur. We had two children. Charles and Emily.’ He smiled. ‘The names work well for both French and English. I thought all was well. For ten years, it was good. Every other Noël we went to her parents in Boston. Then, one day, when Emily was ten and Charles was twelve’ – he snapped his fingers – ‘she told me it was over and she was going home. She wanted a divorce. And she was taking the children with her.’

‘Oh my God. Oh, Olivier. That’s terrible. How could she do that?’

He shrugged. ‘I don’t know, but she did. And what could I do? I worked for my father. I couldn’t go to the States and live there if we were no longer married. It was impossible.’

He paused, finding it very painful. He took a gulp of coffee, and Juliet saw the glitter of tears in his eyes even now.

‘Three months later, they were gone. I go to visit twice a year. There is FaceTime, but I don’t feel like their father. She has married someone else. He takes them to the pool, to sport, wherever.’ His expression was bleak.

‘I don’t know what to say, Olivier. That was so cruel. How could any woman do that to her kids?’

‘Emma always knew what she wanted and how to get it. It is a good trait in a lawyer but not a wife.’

‘Is that why you left your job?’

‘Oui. I had a dépression nerveuse. I could not work in law anymore. My mind was …’ He indicated all over the place. ‘I had some money from my grandmère. I left my father’s company and decided to open the shop. My comfort was always books. I surrounded myself with them. It was a good decision, I think.’

‘It’s a wonderful shop.’

He smiled. ‘And next year, Charles is coming to Paris to do law. He’s going to live with my parents. It’s his decision, and I am so proud. I will have my son in the same city as me. And maybe Emily will do the same.’

Juliet reached out and touched his hand. ‘I’m so pleased it’s worked out. But I’m so sorry.’

‘It has been very difficult. But I’m OK.’ His smile was a bit twisted. ‘I work hard in the shop, to make it the best bookshop in Paris. It keeps me sane.’

Juliet felt uncomfortable asking what she was about to ask, but she needed to know. She tried to sound casual. ‘There’s no one else, then?’

He looked at her with a wry smile. ‘Sometimes I have a date. Dinner. But no more. Usually.’ Juliet imagined the occasional sultry, slinky temptation that he gave in to. Was he lying? Was there a different woman in his bed every weekend? ‘I don’t want to make anyone a promise. Or for them to make me any. Promises are only there to be broken.’

‘That’s awful. To think like that.’

He stared at her. She shrank back a little at the look in his eyes.

‘It took me a long time,’ he said, ‘to trust, after you vanished. Emma was the first woman I put my faith in. And what she did was worse. The worst.’

Juliet couldn’t help her gaze wander towards the wedding ring on his left hand. He saw her looking. He held it up.

‘It’s the easiest way to keep people away.’

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