Page 12 of Defeated

“I’m here right now. It makes sense that I deal with it,” I say.

“That’s not something you should face on your own. That’s despite not wanting Penny to walk into a fight—or in Penny’s case—jump in with both feet. But she’d be pissed if she learned you were out there dealing with it on your own, and so would I.”

“I can deal with a couple of shifters on my own.” I’m not an alpha, but I’ve been in more than my fair share of fights. I can hold my own.

He sighs. “But that doesn’t mean you should. We agreed we’d come down together. And Mack won’t be happy with you being there alone.”

Bennett, our beta, and the one responsible for pack safety, didn’t come along because of trouble brewing in Aerin’s aunt’s pack. No one knows if it’s trouble likely to spread, but with Aerin’s father’s pack also having problems, it didn’t seem wise for him to leave Winter Lake. Especially with Aerin so far along in her pregnancy.

“I’m expendable. He won’t mind.” I’m only half-joking.

From Colton’s lengthy pause, he’s clearly taking it as more than a joke.

“Penny told me you don’t talk about what brought you to Winter Lake.” I start telling him it’s none of his business. He talks over me. “I’m not asking. But I’m just saying Penny would be upset if you got yourself killed thinking you have something to atone for.”

“What makes you think I have something to atone for?”

He snorts. “The fact you don’t seem to give a shit about facing down a potential pack on your own. Either you have a death wish, which, given you were requesting slices of Penny’s lemon chiffon cake not that long ago, I’d say that wasn’t it. You were in a hurry to get away from Winter Lake and Mack’s request for you to go for dinner. Sounded like you’d been avoiding him and Aerin.”

He's not wrong about that.

I carefully don’t answer.

Easier to avoid being caught in a lie that way.

He releases a heavy sigh. “Be careful. Penny’s cake competition is tomorrow morning, and I’ll call you after. But be fucking careful. Those shifters weren’t messing around.”

“I can look after myself,” I say, and I hang up before he can remind me that I’m putting myself in a far more dangerous situation than I need to.

Winter Lake isn’t far from Jersey City. If I had an emergency, I know I have people I can call for backup. My packmates, Warren and Tina, would jump in their car and drive straight down here if I needed them. No questions asked.

Colton is right. I am here to atone. Not that it will make a bit of difference.

I cannot atone for the death I caused. But maybe, I can find some way to save this desperate woman like I couldn’t save my mate.

Maybe I can find absolution in that.

If a pack kills me along the way… then maybe it’s what I deserve.

5

ZOE

Idressed so fast that I’m halfway down the road before I realize my shirt is back to front and the label is itching my throat.

Scratching at the irritation, I peer over my shoulder at the alley I bolted out of.

Is it worth going back to sort out this T-shirt? Or will more memories about Harlan make me want to curl up in the corner and cry?

I slow, far too tempted, then shake my head and walk determinedly on.

It isn’t far to my apartment.

I’ll fix my back-to-front T-shirt when I’m not still dealing with the aftereffects of nearly killing an innocent man.

Mostly, I keep going because I’m almost positive I feel a stare boring into my back, and it’s far too easy to imagine Chris is standing at the window peering out at me, phone clamped to his ear, telling Colton about how I nearly killed him.

I silently curse myself again as guilt floods my mind.