Page 47 of Matched with the Player

A relationship was new ground for him, but he wanted a win with Marissa, too.

He cleared away the big, old fashioned telephone on the aluminum desk and took a seat on the surface. Pulling her between his legs, he wanted to be able to look her in the eye.

“This isn’t a good time -”

“There’s nothing more important to me right now than you.” He cupped her shoulders, absorbed the feel of her through her cotton blouse. “Is it the fight? I don’t usually get ticked off like that, but the guy hacked at my shooting wrist.”

“It’s not just that,” she admitted, though the way she worded it suggested the fight played a role. “I guess I’m struggling with being a backstage presence again. Seeing you get hurt tonight made me realize I could go right back to being a caretaker, the practical detail person who helps someone else achieve their dreams without ever discovering my own.”

Honestly, the blow from Wolfson hadn’t been nearly as out of the blue as this one was. Kyle thought he might have reeled a little more from it, too.

“I don’t need a caretaker.” Where the hell had she ever gotten that idea? The desk beneath him squeaked as he leaned forward to impress his point, his hands running down the length of her arms. “I’ve been on the road on my own since my college career-”

“You’re right. That’s not the best word.” She set her boxy purse on the table beside him, not seeming to mind the sweaty smell of him. “But whether you want someone on the road to care for you or not, I already do. I care. And I can’t invest all of myself in that kind of relationship without a mutual commitment.”

“And I want to make one.” He squeezed her hands in his, more certain than ever that he needed to be with her.

That got her attention. She practically did a double take.

“Excuse me?” Her soft words were half drowned out by the din in the locker room next door. Guys hooting and hollering, banging lockers and generally going nuts over a big victory.

“I want to commit to you, Marissa. I want a relationship.” It was a big as hell step for him. A grown-up step. But all the reasons he hadn’t wanted a relationship in the past didn’t apply with her. “You’re not some fly-by-night girlfriend who’s going to get lonely while I’m on the road and mess around behind my back. You care about the same things I do. You’re loyal. Traditional. Hell, I think your job alone qualifies you as a romantic. And I love that.”

Her lower lip dropped, shock rounding her mouth in a silent response.

“We have something special here,” he pressed. “You know it. Let’s not over-think it before it even gets off the ground, okay? Why not take a chance and see how amazing we can be together?”

Chapter Thirteen

Any other woman would be turning cartwheels. She should be turning cartwheels.

Marissa remembered Kyle had dismissed the idea of a relationship just days ago. And now, he wanted to make a commitment to her. But no matter what he wanted, the practical side of her couldn’t envision how it could ever work.

“I am a romantic,” she agreed. “But that doesn’t mean I’m willing to ignore all the obvious problems in the hope of a few months of fun and passion. I won’t tilt at windmills, no matter how much I would like things to work between us.”

Next door, his team burst into some kind of cheer for the coach, toasting him and practically shaking the walls with male shouts and laughter. In the office, the sweat cooled on Kyle’s bare chest, his strong, delectable body only a small facet of what attracted her to a man who’d never been meant for her. She probably should have turned and ran when she’d been too speechless to order her drink that first night they’d met.

Yet she couldn’t find it in her heart to regret the time they’d spent together since then.

He looked at her now with dawning realization in his eyes. She hadn’t given him the answer he’d hoped for and she could almost see him closing off from her. Shutting down. His hands slid from hers. A part of her wanted to take back her words and simply enjoy whatever time she could have with him.

“May I ask what you think the obvious problems are?” His voice sounded like a stranger’s and she felt her heart crack down the center.

She was going to lose him.

“Your commitment is to hockey,” she reminded him, knowing the sport would always come first for him until he won the trophy he wanted so badly. “Mine is to my mother, at least until she recovers. We’ve known that all along.”

“Are you honestly asking me to give up hockey to make a commitment to you?”

Slowly, she shook her head. “I know better than that. I wouldn’t expect you to walk away from the game any more than you’d want me to leave my mom to recover on her own.”

She braced herself waiting for his reply. And her heart broke a little more when he said nothing. A brief, accepting nod was his only response.

Her knees felt liquid and shaky. Her heart raced and she worried she’d do something humiliating like sob her eyes out if she stayed there any longer. So, darting forward for one last kiss on his cheek, she tried not to think about all she was giving up. All she would be leaving behind.

“I’m sorry,” she said, picking up her purse before she walked out of the office and out of his life.

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