Page 38 of Sins and Secrets

I take a deep breath before answering the call. “Hello?”

“Hello, is this Billie Carbone?”

“Yes.” My stomach lurches, and the world feels like it’s shrinking around me. “Is this about my dad?”

“It is,” the woman says, her tone cheerful. “Doctor Michaels wanted me to call and let you know that your father is awake.”

Tears spring to my eyes as I stand up and hurry back into the house. “Is he alright? Is there anything I need to bring with me? I should be able to be there in about an hour.”

“Your father is still not doing well. While he is awake, he is going to need another week or two in the hospital. Doctor Michaels will be able to tell you more when you get here. There’s nothing you need to bring, but you should prepare yourself. The news may not be what you want to hear, but he is awake.”

“Thank you so much.” I rush to the front door and toss the grocery list in my purse. “Have nice day.”

I end the call and toss the phone into my purse before pulling on my shoes. My heart is racing as I head outside to my car.

Papa is awake. Everything is going to be fine. He’s going to get better and then we’re going to be able to start our lives over.

“Billie,” Doctor Michaels says as he meets me outside Papa’s room an hour later. “Thank you for coming. We have a few things to discuss regarding your father’s care. If you want to follow me this way, we can find a private room to speak.”

I follow him down the hall, though all I want to do is run into Papa’s room and hold him tight. I was so close to losing him.

“If you want to take a seat,” Doctor Michaels says, gesturing into a small waiting room.

There is nobody else in the room. I almost wish there was. Other people would have given me something to focus on while Doctor Michaels speaks. It would have been a welcome relief to whatever it is I’m about to hear.

I enter the room and pick a seat near the open window, hoping the fresh air will keep me from throwing up. Everything about being back in the hospital feels like racing here to find him in a coma only a few weeks ago.

I’m going to take him home eventually. Being here today is a good thing. It means that Papa is getting better. I just need to keep my head up and focus on the good. Papa wouldn’t want me to be upset.

“As you know, your father went through a traumatic experience.” Doctor Michaels sits down in one of the chairs across from me and sets his tablet on his lap. “We have a lot to go over with his care, and I know that all of it is going to be a bit overwhelming. Especially once we start talking about his going home. However, we’re not there yet.”

“Do you know how long it will be before I can take him home?” I ask, my voice wavering slightly.

My hands clench into fists. I dig my nails into my palms, trying to remain calm. I count my breaths as Doctor Michaels gives me a sympathetic look.

“It’s going to be a while yet. He is still not breathing on his own. And there is still massive trauma to his body. As you already know, he underwent several surgeries to fix the immediate problems within his body and we have monitored the healing. However, there are several issues that are not healing as well as they should.”

“What does that mean for my father?” Tears blur my vision slightly, but I force them back.

No crying. Crying is for the weak. I have to be strong for Papa.

“He’s going to need a couple revision surgeries. The healing period shouldn’t be too long, but it’s going to be a couple more weeks before he’ll be able to go home.”

“And what’s his plan for going home?” I swallow hard, trying to force down the lump in my throat.

“We can talk about that when we get closer to the date, but he will likely need a caregiver for several weeks after we release him. There is going to be a lot of physical therapy and we will be going to administer constant tests to make sure that his brain is still alright.”

I nod, trying to process all the information without freaking out. None of this is going to be easy, but I didn’t lose Papa. That’s what matters the most. He is alive and he’s still with me.

I’m getting him out of this fucking life before it kills him.

Doctor Michaels emails me a more detailed document regarding Papa before taking me back to his room. I stand in the doorway for a moment, watching him stare blankly at the television on the wall.

After a few seconds, I take a deep breath and walk into the room. I plaster a bright smile on my face as I close the door behind me before turning to Papa. He blinks slowly at me, the breathing tube still in his throat.

I try to force back the tears as I sit beside his bed and take his frail hand. The bruises are fading to yellow beneath the tattoos, but they’re still there as a reminder of the beating he took. I try to speak but I can’t. If I open my mouth, I’m afraid that I might start bawling.

Papa squeezes my hand, running his thumb over the back of it. I smile at him and reach up to wipe away a tear before it has a chance to fall.

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