Page 46 of Keeping Astrid

“Growler?”

Ox’s voice pulled him from the hole his thoughts had fallen into. “Yeah, sorry, sounds good.”

His boss studied him for a second longer, and Growler made sure to hold his gaze. Ox had been a fucking good Delta, and he would be able to see any doubts Growler may have. In fact, he wouldn’t be surprised if Ox had already worked out that he and Astrid were sleeping together.

Without saying a word, Ox headed to his office, and Growler followed him, scooping up the papers so that he wouldn’t forget them.

This meeting wasn’t going to be easy, but then what part of his life had been easy? With his mom always burying herself at the bottom of a bottle, he’d struggled in school, only doing enough to graduate. He’d been a good swimmer which was why he’d joined the Navy, becoming a SEAL his end goal. He’d had to fight his way through BUD/S to achieve it, but he’d done it. He could do difficult with his eyes shut. Except this time, the outcome could affect him more than any other part of his life.

Growler closed the door and headed over to the couch in the corner where Ox was already seated in one of the club chairs.

“What you got for me?” he asked as he sat.

“Are you sure you’re good? I get the feeling that there’s something going on.” Ox sat back, looking relaxed, but Growler knew he could go from relaxed to combat ready in the blink of an eye.

As much as Growler would prefer the conversation be about whatever Ox had found out to do with Astrid’s case, he had to tell him what he’d come to the office to say.

“I’ve got something I need to talk to you about, and I’m not sure how you’re going to react to it.”

Ox straightened, still giving the impression of being relaxed but definitely more alert than he had been a second ago. “Go on.”

“It wasn’t a conscious thought. I didn’t expect it at all. It just happened and”—Growler took a breath, annoyed that nothing he was saying made any sense, even to his own ears—“I don’t know what your policy is, but my relationship with Astrid has changed.”

“Changed in what way?” Ox asked before Growler could say anymore.

“She’s mine,” he simply said and prayed that his boss understood what he meant by that.

“Yours? In what way?”

Fuck, of course, Ox wouldn’t make it easy for him and, honestly, Growler couldn’t blame him. This was his business. His reputation around the city that was at stake. Imagine what other high-profile people would think when they wanted security to hear that the guards Ox employed did what Growler was doing.

No way could he avoid it anymore. He needed to put everyone on the table. Lay it out and deal with the consequences. “I’m falling in love with Astrid. We’ve slept together, and she says she feels the same way about me.”

The words burst out of him like firecrackers, and now that they were out there, a burden appeared to lift from his shoulders.

Ox crossed his leg and rest his ankle on his knee. “That’s not what I expected to hear from you.”

At least he hadn’t fired Growler’s ass—yet.

“I’m sure it isn’t.”

“Are you sure what you’re both feeling is real and not because of the circumstances you’ve found yourself in? Close proximity? Astrid is confusing fear and gratitude for love.”

Growler’s temper rose at the last comment and he counted to ten to try to cool it. It wouldn’t do any good to go off at Ox for saying such an assholish comment. “No, it’s not.”

It wasn’t the first time he’d thought this. He’d asked Astrid and she’d said it wasn’t, but did she really know? How did he really know?

Fuck, he hated that Ox had planted little seeds of doubt when he thought he’d squashed them. There was no doubt about how he felt about Astrid. If he never saw her again, he would be half the man he was. His heart would shrivel into a tiny hard stone.

“Interesting,” Ox murmured, and Growler lifted his gaze to find his boss watching him.

“What’s interesting?” he asked after a moment.

“Your reaction. The anger that you experienced after what I said, and then the moment you wondered if maybe I was right. And the devastation you experienced if it turned out that what you’re feeling for Astrid isn’t returned.”

How the fuck had he been able to see all of that? Growler was never one to show his emotions. Hell, it could’ve gotten him or his team killed if he’d ever shown any indication that his head wasn’t in the game.

“Yeah, well, I don’t know what to say. I only know how I feel. I also believe that Astrid isn’t lying to me when she says she feels the same.”