Page 76 of Nanny to the Mafia

“You’ll come back to me?” His was hoarse, sleep still residing.

I nodded, and he let me go.

Why did I do that?

I put Cora in her cot and carefully covered her up. She rolled her plump thighs on top of her teddy bear. I imagined the breath leaving the bear in a whoosh.

How could this little angel be the product of two killers? Was this training with the bear?

I shook my head roughly, ridding myself of these ridiculous thoughts. Besides, I didn’t care to imagine Antonio with another woman.

One day, though, he will be… after this arrangement is over.

I turned around to find him watching me. He looked casual sitting in that chair but there was a hardness to his eyes that screamed Mafia. Funny how I was seeing it only now. He gestured with his finger to come closer. Like the metal to his magnet, I went. I was defenceless and under his power.

He looped his arms around my waist, pulled me closer, and rested his head on my belly. Giving in to the urge to rub his hair would be too easy. Which is exactly why I fought it. But my body had other plans and relaxed into his arms, wallowing in comfort.

“Everyone’s been telling me good things about you,” I whispered.

He tilted his head and pinned me with his hard eyes. “They lied.”

His direct words shot a sharp arrow into my mind. When I was trying to hold on to the ledge, he kicked me off. I pushed him away, whirled around, and rushed out of the room into ours. I paced the length of the bed, agitation drilling through my body.

When he strode in, I threw his words back at him. “They lied? Did you tell them to?”

“No.”

“What part of it was a lie?”

“I’ve no idea what they told you.”

I stood in the middle of the room, my mouth open. “You just told me they lied.”

“I don’t need to know what they said to know that.” He stepped closer to me, his hands in his pockets. With his sleeves rolled up he eluded casualness. “What did they say? That I am a good man?” He let a thin laugh slip out at my surprise. “Don’t need to be a rocket scientist to know that.”

He walked over to the dresser and poured himself a glass of his liquid. Cool, controlled movements. He must truly not care to be this calm. Turning around, he watched me as he sipped his drink. “Well, I am not.”

“Well then, this arrangement is done,” I snapped and strode to the door.

He was on me in a second, spinning me around and pinning me to the wall.

“What do you want me to say, then?” he hissed.

“Let me go!” I screamed.

“No.” He sighed, trying to rein in his anger and failing miserably. “I do horrible things. I am involved in all kinds of illegal businesses. Do you know what my position is? I am the consigliere. Do you know what that is? I advise the don about anything and everything. So, there is no activity I know nothing about. I kill people. I don’t get any pleasure from it. But if I have to, I will kill and I have. That is how you become a fucking made man. So, you see…” he slammed his fist onto the wall right next to me, jerking my nerves and splintering the plaster on the wall, “There is nothing fucking good about me.”

“You should have told me—”

“Yes. I should have fucking not hired you, and I should have fucking told you. So shoot me. I’ll give you the gun.” He laughed at my startled face. “You were so innocent. You are so innocent and good… I didn’t want to bring the darkness of my life into yours.”

“But you did anyway,” I wailed. “You are bringing all your darkness when I was already drowning. I can’t handle this. I can’t. You kill babies—”

“For fuck’s sake. We don’t fucking kill babies or women.”

“Tell me what you do, then.”

“I can’t.”

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