Page 97 of Just a Footnote

The two days left of his trip pass in a blur. They make love to one another so often that Aiden thinks he’ll feel Liam for weeks once they part. Aiden sleeps in the bed afterwards with Liam wrapped around him, no longer needing to flee the intimacy of sharing a bed with the man he loves. It feels like they’re trapped in a snow globe. Everything is frozen around them, time is meaningless.

On New Year’s Eve they bake up a storm, sharing stories between them that they’ve never told anyone else. The hour leading up to midnight, Liam puts on some standards. They slowly spin around the living room, sharing smiles, sharing their love. Aiden’s heart feels so full he feels like he might die. When they kiss at midnight, Aiden wishes that he could keep Liam with him all the time, tucked safely inside his heart.

Their final morning dawns brighter than it should. Neither of them utter a single word. Slowly, they pack everything up as though Aiden doesn’t have to be at the airport in a matter of hours. Liam doesn’t say anything when Aiden puts his hoodie on but he can’t hide the warm-as-honey grin on his lips. He can’t help but hold Liam’s hand in his the entire drive to the airport, memorizing the weight of Liam’s palm against his own.

Instead of dropping Aiden off at departures, Liam parks in the parking garage. Liam walks him into the airport without a hat or sunglasses on as if he doesn’t care if anyone notices him. Aiden purposefully stays just out of reach so that Liam isn't tempted to touch him.

“You’ll call me when you land back in New York?” Liam asks quietly. Hands stuffed in his pockets, he rocks back on the balls of his feet in a nervous habit. It reminds Aiden so much of Liam back in college.

“I’ll call you the minute I land,” Aiden reassures him.

“You promise?” Liam’s voice sounds small. With startling clarity, Aiden realizes Liam thinks this might be it. Aiden will go home, never call, and run as far away as he can. And he’d be lying if he said he hasn’t thought of doing that. He has. But he’s not going to do it. It’s too late now.

Aiden smiles. “I promise.”

“I really want to kiss you right now,” Liam whispers, sounding wrecked by the fact he can’t kiss Aiden one final time.

Aiden bites back a smile. He wants that too, but he won’t allow it. “Hug me instead?”

Liam doesn’t need to be told twice. He envelops Aiden in his big arms, squeezing tight enough that it feels like Aiden might stop breathing. The familiar smell of oranges washes over him. He buries his face in Liam’s neck, breathing deeply. If he tries hard enough maybe he can memorize the smell to recall at another time.

“I’m in love with you, Aiden Clark,” Liam says into his ear. His hands dig into the small of Aiden’s back, pulling him as close as he dares in public. “So fucking in love with you. I’m going to take you somewhere warm during the off season. I swear it.”

“You just want an excuse to slather me in sunscreen. I know your diabolical plot.”

Liam laughs against his face, breath fanning across his cheek. His lips graze against Aiden’s ear, eliciting a shiver from Aiden. “You got me.”

Aiden pulls away and steps back, putting needed distance between them. He backs up towards security, waving, watching as Liam gets enveloped by other people. Until he can’t see him at all. His heart aches once he’s alone. It feels like he’s lost a limb. He’s read about phantom pain for a class, about how when a patient loses a limb sometimes they still feel pain there. That’s how he feels about Liam. He’s gone, but at the same time he’snot. Like maybe a piece of him stayed inside Aiden when they parted.

He can’t sleep on the return flight to New York. He’s pretty sure the only reason he slept on the flight to Seattle is because he was so exhausted mentally that it’s the only thing his body could do.

The plane lands safely without anyone clapping this time. Aiden gets off the plane, jostled by other passengers, and immediately turns his phone off airplane mode. He ignores all the notifications to immediately call Liam instead. Priorities.

“Just landed,” Aiden says into the phone.

“I miss you.”

Aiden’s heart flops painfully in his chest. “I miss you too. Maybe we can FaceTime later?”

“It’s not the same,” Liam complains.

“No, but we have to get used to it. Right?”

“Sure. I love you.”

“Okay. I’ll text you later?”

They say goodbye, hanging up just as Aiden steps through to arrivals. Archer waits just outside at the curb in his car with a weirdly somber looking Miles.

“Hey dickwad,” Aiden says in greeting to Miles. “Brother.”

“You look happy,” Archer says with a shit-eating grin as he pulls away from the curb. “Have a good week away?”

Aiden sighs. “Go fuck yourself.”

Miles turns around in the passenger seat to regard him. “Why are you the way that you are?”

“Trauma,” Archer and Aiden say in unison.

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