Page 67 of Letting it Ride

I gesture meekly toward the child in the center of the room. “He just… started. I don’t know what triggered it. Is there anoff switch?”

She hands James to me and disappears into the kitchen, coming back with two bottles just as James seems to be contemplating joining his brother’s serenade. I’m going to invest in ear plugs before I babysit again.

Who am I kidding? I’m never babysitting again. A vasectomy is looking pretty good right now, honestly.

Addie hands one of the bottles to me. I angle it toward James, and he grips it with his chubby baby hands as I put the nipple in his mouth, then awkwardly try to balance him in my arms. Addie just sticks the other bottle in Leo’s open mouth, then scoops up the whole bundle into her arms while Leo sucks contentedly on his bottle.

“They’ll probably go down for a nap after they finish,” she whispers. “Try to keep things quiet and calm.”

Yeah, cause I’m the one who’s been making this day anything less thanquiet and calm.

Addie is right, of course. James’s eyes get heavy as he reaches the end of the bottle. At one point, I try to pull it out of his mouth, but he sucks it back in, so I let it stay there. Finally, it slips from his mouth as his breathing evens out.

I look up at Addie. “Now what?” I whisper.

“Follow me. Move slowly and smoothly.” Sheclimbs to her feet with the grace of a ballerina, holding Leo steady, and I do my best to copy her. We tiptoe together toward the guest room where two cribs are set up. James stirs briefly, and I freeze, but he settles back into sleep.

“Now you sloooowwwly lower him down,” Addie says, drawing the word out as she places Leo in the crib like she’s handling an active bomb, “then back away, one step at a time. Don’t look away. Don’t show fear.”

25

ADDISON

To:[email protected]

From:[email protected]

Subject:Re: Senior class advisor

Hi Ms. Anderson,

Hope your break is going well. I have to admit your lack of response has me a bit worried; I hope you’re safe and healthy. Can you give me a final answer on your ability to commit to being senior class advisor? It would mean a lot to the students.

Patricia Smith

Vice Principal, Bryn MawrHigh School

Ipull the door shut behind us, turning the knob before I close it so the click of the door latching won’t wake the babies. I press my ear to the door after it’s closed, waiting for any wails of distress, but it’s silent, and I breathe a sigh of relief.Finally.

I stick my head into Maddox’s office, coaxing out the Dalmatian that’s doing its best to hide under the desk. “Come on, Jasper,” I croon. “The babies are asleep. You can come out now.”

I tilt my head toward the living room. Cam and Jasper follow me silently, and Cam and I both sink onto the large couch in the center of the room while Jasper settles at our feet with a huff, lowering his head to his paws.

“Holy fuck,” Cam breathes, pushing a hand through his hair.

I’d laugh, but I’m feeling exactly the same. I shrug my shoulder, testing my injured arm. I had the stitches removed a few days ago, and it seems to have healed quickly. I’d forgotten how much work a baby is, let alone two. I used to help my mom with the little ones when she cared for foster kids, especially once Maddox and Josie were grown and out of the house.

“Yeah,” I say, shaking my head. “They’re a handful. I can’t imagine having to be responsible for a kid all thetime. An afternoon is plenty.” I frown. “I mean, maybe someday. Not right now, at least. And maybe it’s different when it’s your kid.”

Cam slides an arm around me and squeezes my shoulder. “You’re going to be an amazing mom one day, Addie. Baby pee and all.”

I look at him, trying to read his expression, but he looks completely sincere.

“Seriously,” he insists.

I’m not sure how to answer that. I’ve always been terrible at receiving compliments. I settle for just twirling my hair around my finger while studying the baby monitor.

“Addie,” he says, pulling away to look me fully in the eye. “Is that something you want? For real? Marriage, kids, a house, all of it?”

---