Page 45 of Going All In

The ride to Mama Maria’s, a pizzeria about halfway between our two apartment buildings, is short, and we’re lucky enough to find on-street parking close by. Once we’re out of the car, she lets out a heavy sigh, breath fogging in front of her in the chilly air.

“I’m sorry. I’m just in kind of a weird mood.” She shrugs her shoulders.

I offer her my hand. “It’s okay. Let’s go in where it’s warm and you can tell me what’s up. I’m a good listener, remember?”

That elicits a small smile from her.

We’re seated in a cozy booth toward the back, with a view of the brick ovens they use to cook the pizzas. The open flame makes it feel warm and inviting.

I wait until we’ve gotten our drinks and placed our order for a pizza to split. Once the waitress moves away from our table, I tilt my wineglass toward Holly. “Okay. Spill. What’s going on that you didn’t want to tell me over the phone?”

She chews on her lower lip. I’m learning that it’s one of her tells; she does it when she’s nervous or unsure of how to say something. “You know how I went out with Justin?”

Yeah, I remember. I wanted to punch his lights out. “Sure. Why?”

“Well, I talked to JJ after I came back from the dress fitting with Judy. Your mom is amazing, by the way. I love her.”

I let her stall to put her at ease. There’s no rush. “Everyone loves my mom. She likes you, too.”

Holly nods slowly, her fingers tracing the rim of her wineglass. “So… JJ asked me who it is I really like. If I actually like Justin.”

My heart thuds in my chest.Please say it’s me.

She takes a sip of her wine. “And I realized… I don’t. He’s a lot like me. Too alike, probably. I met up with him, and it turns out there’s someone he wants to pursue as well.”

I pick up my napkin and put it on my lap to give my hands something to do. “I guess that makes it easier to make your decision then too, right?”

“Kind of. But the person he wants to pursue is JJ.”

“Your roommate?”

She nods.

“Did something happen that night you were all at the bar?”

“No. He’s actually a gentleman, it turns out. He just got to know her. He asked for my blessing to date her.” She shrugs and takes a sip of her wine as the waitress drops off our order of mozzarella sticks. “Maybe he’s one of the last real good guys, you know?”

I dip a mozzarella stick in marinara—close enough to ketchup to be a solid dipping sauce—and point the fried cheese at her. “He’s not the last good guy, Holly. There are more out there. I promise.” I bite off the half that’s covered in tomato sauce, then double dip.

Holly smiles, her first genuine smile of the night. “You looked just like JJ when you did that. She points her food at me when she’s making a point that she’s really serious about.” She looks thoughtful. “Maybe she and Justin really are a good match, you know?”

“Well, if so, I’m happy for them.”

Holly chews on a mozzarella stick. Without dipping it in the marinara, I would like to point out. We all have our shortcomings. “I still need a date for the wedding, though. Someone who’s not… you know.” She nods her head, like she’s trying to convince herself.

Maybe a public restaurant isn’t the time to go digging into someone’s deep dark secrets, but then again, there’s no time like the present.

I wipe my hands on the napkin in my lap. “Holly, what’s the real story here? I know we made the bet and all, and it was a shock to find out our parents were together. I get it. But seriously. There’s another reason you don’t think we can be together. What’s the real thing keeping us apart right now?”

15

HOLLY

Alump rises in my throat, keeping words from coming out. I take a sip of water, trying to gather my courage, but it goes down the wrong way and I end up coughing for several moments.

When I can breathe again, I’m not any more ready to talk about it. JJ is right, though. I owe him this.

“So, three years ago…” I start.

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