Page 7 of He Will Come for Me

Clara’s mouth opens and closes a couple of times before she heaves a sigh. “You’ll have to ask Mr. Phoenix.”

I want to scream. I want to tear this room apart. I want to run. But I don’t do any of those things. I don’t have the strength. Instead, I stand with a sigh of defeat.

“I’d like to take my bath now.” Slowly walking to the bathroom, I can feel their eyes on me, but I ignore them.

Where is my father? Is he looking for me? Is he worried? Does he care?

Chapter 4

For the next several days, I refused to talk to anyone. Clara brings me broth and adds a croissant to every meal. I’m sure it’s her attempt to make me feel better, but I need more than a croissant to feel better. I’m not shaking anymore, so I don’t need help to feed myself. Which is good because I’d starve before allowing them to help me again.

I’m angry, sad, and frustrated. That isn’t helping my withdrawals. The shaking has stopped, but my body is still craving whatever they were giving me. My emotions are feeding into that craving. It makes me want to claw my skin off.

To make things worse, Phoenix isn’t back yet, so I can’t ask him the questions running around in my head. My hunger has returned to full force as well. The broth and croissant aren’tenough. When Clara comes into my room, I suck up how I’m feeling.

“Clara, could I get something more than the broth and croissant? I’m starving.” I finally break my silence, but I refuse to look at her. I know it’s not her fault I’m here, but I’m having a hard time disassociating her from this, since she’s the person I see the most.

“Of course. I’ll go grab you a banana. If you can handle that, I’ll get Phillip to make you some mashed potatoes or rice.”

“Thank you,” I mumble. I close my eyes and sigh. I have to stop blaming her. She’s been nothing but kind to me and I’ve been anything but.

Nurse Millie removed the IV yesterday as long as I drink enough water and there are some supplements Dr. Chamberland told me to take until I’m eating regularly. When Clara comes back with the banana, I have to force myself not to devour it.

She goes into the bathroom to clean and then comes out to dust the furniture. I watch her as I take small bites of the banana.

“Clara?” She turns to me, giving me her attention. “I’m sorry I’ve snapped at you so much. I’ve taken out how I’ve been feeling on you and that’s not fair.”

She smiles at me before sitting next to me on the bed. Her finger trails along the back of my hand. “I know this hasn’t been easy for you, but I’m here if you need me.” I lean forward and hug her. It seems to surprise her, but she returns my hug. Pulling back, I offer an embarrassed smile.

“Sorry. I just…” I trail off. She pats my hand and stands to continue her dusting.

“No need to apologize. I’m here if you need hugs, too.” I let out a watery laugh before changing the subject.

“Do you know who Phoenix rescued me from?” I hate calling it a rescue when I’m technically still a prisoner. Clara stops dusting for a second before continuing.

“I don’t know any details, Miss McKenzie.”

I take another bite of my banana as I study her. “But you do know something.” She sighs and gives me a pleading look.

“You’ll have to ask Mr. Phoenix.”

“You said if I needed anything,” I remind her.

She gestures to the banana. “I meant if you needed extra snacks, or a hug, or someone to vent to. I can’t answer questions I don’t know the answers to. So, you’ll have to ask Mr. Phoenix.”

“He’s not here to ask,” I mumble.When will he be back?

“He had business to attend to.”

“When will he be back?”

Clara sighs again. “I don’t know. I doubt he’ll be gone much longer. But he doesn’t tell me his schedule.”

Ignoring the frustration that bubbles up in my chest, I stand and wipe my hands down on the leggings I’ve been provided. There’s a closet full of jeans, shirts, leggings, dresses, and shoes in the room they have me in, but I’ve only taken advantage of the leggings and sweatshirts. I’m never going to be cold again if I can help it.

“I think I’d like you to take me on that tour you’ve been offering.” Clara doesn’t try to hide the surprise on her face. Part of me hates to give in, but they chained me to a bed for months and I want to see something that’s beyond these four walls. Maybe I can begin planning my escape.

“Of course!” She looks so excited I almost feel guilty for thinking about escaping, but I ignore it. No one else is going to look out for me. I have to look out for myself. She motions for the door and I follow her out into the hallway. I’ve seen the hallway from my doorway, but that’s all.

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