Page 76 of He Will Come for Me

Stepping back out into the hallway, I hold my breath and ignore the nausea that threatens. I swallow a couple of times. I descend the stairs quietly. When I get to the bottom, I stay perfectly still and listen for any movement. When I’m sure no one else is awake, I slowly walk to the library. Entering, I lock the door and walk over to the window.

I place my bag on the floor and sit at the window seat, staring out at the lake. I try to think of a plan, but I can’t stop thinking about how Phoenix has lied to me. He’s made himself out to be this savior, and I fell for it. I think back to the intimate moments we shared as I play with the ring on my finger. I married him, but it wasn’t willingly. But since I’ve been here, he’s told me he loves me and we definitely have sex more than we did when we first got married. I still don’t remember everything, though. I wish I could pinpoint exactly what is making my memories return.

He had to host an auction, or we did. It made me remember the first auction more clearly. I didn’t argue with my father about the dress because I wanted to wear it. No, he made me wear it. Phoenix said he saved me from the headmaster buying me, but my father never said who was going to buy me, just that he had someone lined up.

If Phoenix decides to come looking for me, this will be the first place he’ll look. I became too comfortable. I stopped looking for a way out and now I have no idea what to do. Phoenix said I was angry at him for not telling me what he was doing. He even said I didn’t go to an auction in the beginning, but that’s not true either.

I place my hands on top of my head and lean my forehead on my bent knees. I’m so confused. I have no idea what’s going on and I wish I could still live in the sweet bliss of not knowing what I know now. A tear falls down my cheek and I wipe it away in frustration. He doesn’t deserve my tears. My thoughts turn to Anna and leaving her here.

Was Anna the one he was looking for at the auction his mom kidnapped me at? Was he really looking for her at the auction he bought me? My stomach stirs and my chest constricts. I begin to feel lightheaded as my breathing quickens. Will this be how I die? I feel like I’m going to die.

I force myself to take a deep breath in and exhale slowly. I place my cheek on the cool window as I close my eyes and force all the thoughts and questions bombarding me from my mind. Once my breathing slows and my chest doesn’t feel like someone is sitting on me, I form a plan.

The alarm is put on every night, but I know the alarm code. The only problem is when someone disarms the alarm, it immediately notifies Rex and Phoenix. So, if I unarm the alarm, I have maybe five minutes to make it to the rowboat on the lake. Even then, they’ll probably get me quickly because of the jet ski or the motor boat they have.

Why is the Phoenix now different from the Phoenix who bought and married me? Did things eventually get better? Even if they did, he still had me eating out of the palm of his hand right from the beginning. Unless… Maybe his mom kidnappingme that time made me change my tune. I want to scream, but I force myself to stop before I have another panic attack.

With it being the middle of the night, how quickly will they react? I could get down to the boat and push it out on the water as a distraction. Maybe I could take the jet ski. I don’t know it well enough to be able to do that. Or, I could go back upstairs, act like nothing has happened and the next time Phoenix and Rex have to go somewhere, I can run.

That’s the answer. That’s what I’m going to have to do. Sighing, I pull the pajamas I had on out of the bag, take off the leggings and hoodie, and put the pajamas back on. Stuffing everything in the bag, I open the storage area under the window seat and put the bag in it. I take one more deep breath before I leave the library and go to the kitchen. Grabbing a water, I lean against the counter and sip at it.

I don’t want to go back upstairs. I don’t know if I can do this. Pouring the rest of the water out, I place the cup in the dishwasher and turn to head upstairs.

“Jesus Christ!” I place my hand over my chest at the sight of Phoenix leaning against the doorway in the kitchen. “Don’t do that!” I chastise him.

He chuckles as he pushes away from the doorway and walks toward me. I can’t help myself when my eyes trail down his naked chest to his boxer briefs, to his legs and back up. My body betrays me with its reaction. “See something you like, love?” I tear my eyes away from his hardening cock to his face. The question reminds me of the memories that just assaulted me.

“Sorry, I woke up not feeling well, so I got some water.” I ignore his question because if I admit to it, he might do something about it. And as much as I want to run away, I also know how much I care about him. He told me he loved me. Did he mean it?

“No need to apologize. When you didn’t come right back, I came to look for you.” He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me close to him. “What’s wrong?” He places the back of his hand on my forehead.

“I woke up sweating, but I was freezing. I’m not feeling the best.” It’s a half truth. I did wake up that way and I’m not feeling well. He purses his lips and his eyes crinkle slightly as he studies me.

“Did you take anything?”

“No, I don’t know where that kind of stuff is.” He turns toward a cabinet, opening it to reveal a First Aid Kit. He opens it, hands me the Motrin, and fills another glass of water for me. I take the Motrin and drink all the water. He takes my hand and leads me back upstairs.

He seems so concerned and I want to believe he is and this isn’t an act, but I don’t know what to believe anymore. “You’re sure that’s all that’s wrong?” he asks.

“Yes,” I whisper, hoping he doesn’t try to grill me.

“If you’re not feeling better in the morning, I’ll call Dr. Chamberland to come over and check you out.” I nod as he helps me into bed and lays down next to me.

“Are you cold?” he asks. I’m shaking slightly, but I don’t know if it’s from the adrenaline leaving my body or because I am cold.

“A little,” I whisper. He pulls me close, adjusting me so my back is to his chest. He grabs the blankets, wrapping them tightly over us. I stiffen for the briefest moment before I relax into him. “I don’t want to get you sick, if I’m getting sick.”

He runs his lips over the back of my neck. “I’ll be fine, love. Don’t worry about me.” I allow myself to be enveloped by his warmth and his smell before succumbing to my exhaustion.

Over the next several days, I keep my eyes open for opportunities to run, although I’m beginning to have second thoughts. Dr. Chamberland came to check on me and said I would be fine, but to make sure I stayed hydrated and to rest if I started feeling bad again. I bake, read, have a movie night with Anna, and go for walks to think through all my memories. I wanted to talk to Anna about them. I considered asking her if she’d leave with me if I do decide to run, but she’s not strong enough yet.

Thankfully, because Phoenix is trying to give me space to recover, he doesn’t try to sleep with me. He does stay at home to work because he wants to be close to me while I’m not feeling well. Each night we climb into bed, he wraps his arms around me, and he holds me close as we fall asleep. After the fourth night, I know if I don’t do something soon, I’m going to fall back under his spell. What is it about him that makes him so irresistible?

Then it happens. I wake up one morning, and Phoenix is already gone for the day. He left me a note on my nightstand.

Had to leave early to do some business with Rex. Be home in time for dinner. Call me if you need me. Miss you already, Phoenix.

My heart clinches, still at war with what I should do. I get dressed in some warm clothes and comfortable shoes before going downstairs.

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