Page 97 of Balls to the Walls

“He just did!” I said, pointing at his lifeless body.

Fox strolled over without a care in the world. “Boss, how many times have you seen FNG die before? I’m telling you, he’s fine.”

“He’s not fine. He has no pulse!”

“Right, but it’ll come back,” he said confidently.

“And if it doesn’t? How the fuck am I supposed to explain this to anyone?”

He frowned a little. “Well, it was you that said you wanted me down here interrogating him.”

“Right, but I said no torture. I specifically stated that.”

“You know, I’m not sure anyone’s going to believe you. It’s your word against mine.”

“Yeah? And who’s the resident psychopath around here?”

“Boss,” he frowned. “Those words hurt. They might be true, but I still have feelings, the same as you.”

“So does he! I’m sure he’s feeling a little dead right now.”

Fox studied FNG, grinning the whole time. “Nah, he’s taking a nap.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to gain some control before I snapped his neck and ended up in jail right beside him. “Fox, you can’t electrocute someone just because they say they can’t die.”

“Why? We test boundaries all the time. Like, if you were to say that Funyuns were disgusting, I would make you try one in front of me, just to make sure your reaction was appropriate. That’s the only way to know for sure that it’s true.”

“But we’re not talking about eating Funyuns. We’re talking about living versus dying.”

“And he’s still alive,” he repeated.

“No, he’s not,” I gritted out. “The man is laying on the floor without a pulse!”

FNG gasped for air, sitting upright, nearly knocking heads with me. “Holy shit, that was a crazy ride.” He turned and looked at Fox, then held up his hand for a high five that Fox gave very enthusiastically.

“See, boss? I told you he couldn’t die.”

He hauled FNG to his feet, then patted down his hair. “You’re a little singed.”

“Right? I can still feel the current running through me. It’s a total high.”

“I’ll have to try it sometime?—”

“No,” I snapped, getting to my feet. The insanity had to stop. “No more. You won’t be testing out any more theories on each other. I’m ashamed that I even considered having Fox interrogate you. I should have known it would end up this way, but I stupidly assumed he’d force you to watch musicals with him until you broke.”

Fox snapped his fingers, nodding at FNG. “You know, that would have been so awesome.”

“Maybe next time.”

“There will be no next time,” I argued. “Never again will I ask you to do this!”

“Now, boss,” Fox chuckled. “Don’t be too quick to throw out judgments. Remember, I just interrogated the man that shot you. See how that turned out?”

“Yes, they all died.”

“Well, yeah, but they were trying to kill us. I thought you wanted me to kill baddies.”

“I do, but—” I wasn’t going to sit here and have this argument with him. “Did you at least find out anything?”

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