Page 235 of Shy Girls Can't Fake Date

“I just want you to be safe.”

“Parker made me feel safe.” And at that, another avalanche of tears fall.

I hang my head as I hiccup my cries. Tess holds me close, cooing that everything will be okay.

Will it though? I knew this day was coming. Parker and I always had an expiration date. If I’m this crushed by a fake relationship ending, how will I ever survive the collapse of a real one?

Thirty-One

I’ve hidden in my bedroomsince Friday morning. It’s nearing midday on Saturday, and I’m now refreshed after a shower. Tess has been badgering me to take one since last night, but I was too broken to get up. Now that she and my parents have left for a day at the mall, it felt safe to leave the sanctuary of my bedroom.

This is what I feared most. After all this was done, I’d be alone.

I sit on the edge of my bed, clutching the bunny Parker won at the fair.

A day when I was so mad at Parker for kissing me. A night when I was so sure I’d won Lewis’s heart.

I get up and walk to my window. I look down at the fenceline and air hitches in my throat.

Lewis.

He tosses a black plastic bag into his trash can and then wanders along the fenceline. The melancholy is evident in his walk and his head hangs low.

My eyes close as I think back to the last morning of the camping trip. Lewis’s words replay in my mind.“Maybe with the right girl it wouldn’t feel so hard.”

He was signaling to me. He wanted me to know that being with him was an option.

I toss the stuffed bunny across the room and pace toward my wardrobe. This isn’t going to be all for nothing. Dang it, I did this to be with Lewis. And there he is. Newly single and in the front yard. I’m done living in fantasy. I’m not watching him from afar for another year and a half.

It’s time to make my move.

If Parker’s not going to be alone at the end of this, neither am I.

I check my hair in front of the full-length mirror and hurriedly change out of my sweats. I find my cutest blue outfit, and clasp my sapphire necklace around my neck. After a flick of mascara, I race out of my bedroom and downstairs to the front door.

“Lewis!” I call out, sprinting toward his yard.

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