Page 64 of Lethal Saint

So instead I asked, “Will you come for me?”

She blinked in surprise, but in the next moment she reached behind herself and curled her fingers around my hand, pulling it around her body and pressing it to the fierce heat between her thighs.

“You can use your safeword at any time, remember?” I said, my voice scratchy as I met her eyes, my heart raw. “Not just during sex. If you don’t want me near you right now—”

“Shut up,” she interrupted gently, pressing my hand more insistently against her pussy through the thin veil of black tulle and lace on her body. “I want you near. I want you as close as I can get you, always.”

My breath shuddered. I stroked her over her lacy underwear, my touch light. Hesitant.

“Come to bed, Damien,” Vasilisa said quietly, leaning up to kiss me. It was a soft brush, a flutter of lips on mine, gentle—reassuring. She was trying to reassure me, because I was acting like a shell-shocked kid after their first kill.

It wasn’t the murder. It was the things that fucking monster said.

Vasilisa bundled me down the hall with gentle but effective movements, handling me like I was a spooked horse. “Is it always like this after…?”

“No,” I rasped. “This is the first time I’ve felt this.”

Disgust, hot and acidic, sliced through my stomach. Tainting me, covering me in an oily sheen of dirt and grime and wrongness. Blood was cleansing; torture was calming. Neither of those things had been true tonight. With Mark yes, but Boris? He tortured me even as I cut him open.

I didn’t resist as my wife pushed me onto the bed, propping me against the cushions and headboard, but when she climbed on me, facing me, I breathed, “No.”

If she was facing me, riding my hand, I’d lose my battle and sheathe my cock in her. I couldn’t. I didn’t know how to explain why but—it was too far. It was demanding too much of her. If I was the one touching her, getting no release, I could tell myself it was all for her and not because I was a needy bastard.

She paused, hovering over me, insecurity creeping into her expression.

“Lay back against me,” I said, swallowing the knot in my throat. “Here, between my legs. Fuck,” I rasped when she settled her back against my chest, the contact making my eyes slam shut. “That’s what I need, my queen, rest all your weight on me.”

I kissed the top of her head, the side of her face, the bare skin of her shoulder on either side of the flimsy straps of her negligee. I never expected her to wear it when I ordered it, but I would deny her nothing, so I bought it on the off chance it was her style. It suited her—dark, bold, and unapologetically sexy.

I exhaled another curse when she ran her hands up and down my legs on either side of her, making slow presses designed to comfort. I let out a deep breath, relaxing into her even if my blood still roared, as hot as lava.

“It’s okay,” she breathed. “You’re okay, I’ve got you.”

Words I’d spoken to her, that I hadn’t quite realised the power of until she repeated them to me.

“I don’t know what the fuck I did to deserve you,” I admitted, the tight knot in my stomach beginning to unwind.

“You killed a hundred people and gave me a life of freedom and really, really good sex.”

That startled a laugh from me, rusty and dry but still, it felt like a victory. Vasilisa tilted her head to look at me, her eyes shadowed with worry but twinkling.

“I mean it,” she said. “You’re pretty good at giving orgasms.”

I grunted, my hands finding her hips, travelling down her thighs until I gripped her knees. “Only pretty good?”

“Everyone needs something to humble them.”

In response I propped her legs up, her feet braced on the bed outside my thighs, and tilted her body until she splayed against my chest. Fucking beautiful.

“What would you prefer?” she asked coolly, like she hadn’t broken out in goosebumps.

“Mind-blowing,” I replied, stroking up and down her inner thighs the way I knew she loved. I was rewarded with a tiny shudder. If she felt the blood coating her from my soaked suit she didn’t show it. If I had any sense, I would have stopped off and disposed of everything I was wearing before I got home, but I needed this, needed her.

“Wow,” she drawled. “Ambitious.”

“I’m covered in blood and you think it’s a good idea to taunt me?”

“Yep.”

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