Page 66 of If You Fight

He nodded and kissed me on the forehead. “Yeah. Staying right here sounds much better.”

I wanted to get lost in the feel of his arms enveloping me. I wanted to love how incredible his body felt against mine and revel in his touch.

But all I could smell was that overly sweet perfume of hers.

Her.

Pushing him away, I shook my head. “I can’t. I can’t do this.”

Ryder grimaced, like my words hurt him. “Can’t do what? Have me hold you? What’s going on, Serena? What’s this about?”

“Nothing,” I said as I turned away, still shaking my head as I tried to get rid of the memory of that sickening smell that threatened to choke me if I stayed there next to him.

He followed me into the living room and grabbed my wrist to stop me. Spinning around, I looked into his eyes and saw anger like I’d never seen from him. Then I looked down at where his hand encircled my arm and felt how strong he was holding me there. He had the ability to crush grown men with his hands, but never before had I thought about how he could do the same to me.

Not until now.

“What’s going on, Serena?”

I didn’t want to do this with him, but my emotions began to spill out all over and the words tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them.

“You fucking smell like her! Is that where you go at night instead of training? Do you go to see her? While I sit here pregnant and worried sick that you’ll be hurt the next time you fight, are you with her?”

Ryder released his hold on my hand and shook his head. His mouth hung open in shock for a moment before he finally said, “I fight for you. For the baby. For us to get the fuck away from here.”

“Then why do you smell like her? All I can smell is that disgustingly sweet perfume all over you,” I choked out as my heart contracted at the thought that he actually might have been with her.

“Like who? There is no her, Serena. There’s you and no one else. Just you,” he explained, his eyes pleading for me to stop.

But I couldn’t.

“That stripper you were with while I was in Italy. The one who was with my father at your fight that night. You smell like her, and it’s making me sick!”

“Kitty?”

I hated the sound of her name coming from his mouth. “Don’t say that name here. Don’t!”

Taking a step toward me, he wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. “Serena, I would never go with her. I made a mistake back then, but don’t let what your father’s trying to do tear us apart.”

Even though I knew he was right, I couldn’t stop myself from pushing him away. Not that it made much difference. He was so much bigger and stronger, so with every shove, he just held me tighter.

“I can’t stand the thought that you were with her, Ryder,” I sobbed into his chest as my emotions finally took over. “Tell me you didn’t go with her now.”

“Serena, I wouldn’t do that,” he whispered against the top of my head. “Don’t do this. Don’t let your father win.”

I looked up and searched his face for the truth. Why would he smell like her if he hadn’t been anywhere near her?

“Does she come around and watch you train, Ryder? Is that why her perfume is all over you?”

He shook his head. “I haven’t seen her since that night, Serena. She’s no one to me, so I don’t even think about her. I don’t know why I would smell like her.”

Inhaling, I smelled his skin and now it seemed like that awful perfume was nowhere to be found. God, was I losing my mind? What was wrong with me?

Ryder tilted my head back and stared down into my eyes with a look that made me feel safe. “I love you, Serena. You’re having my child. How could you think I’d ever be with anyone else?”

“I don’t know. I hated seeing her that night, Ryder. She still cares about you, and there she was about to walk in where I’d just been like she was welcome too.”

He pressed a soft kiss onto my forehead and smiled. “She wasn’t welcome. I would have been happy to never see her again. Your father wanted to cause a fight between us, so he brought her around. I was actually surprised you didn’t mention it that night.”

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