Page 21 of If You Fight

PART TWO

Chapter Seven

Serena

Staring out from behind the black veil pulled down over my face, I sat on the wooden folding chair on the freshly cut green grass next to Oliver’s gravesite and watched a man crank the handle of a machine to lower the casket into the hole in the earth. His mother sitting two seats away from me wept uncontrollably, sobbing into her handkerchief about losing both her sons in one year, and his father held her hand as he struggled to maintain his composure.

To my left, my father sat staring straight ahead, as if seeing someone put in their final resting place engrossed him. His face remained emotionless the entire time, even when Oliver’s mother began wailing when the casket disappeared out of view into the ground.

I knew Ryder stood somewhere nearby, never far away from my father. I yearned to look around and find him to give me that sense of security he always provided, but I felt his gaze on me as I sat there emotionless watching my late husband go into his grave.

He’d never cared one bit for me and would have been sitting just like I was at that moment if our roles were reversed, so I felt no guilt as I hid dry-eyed behind my veil and silently prayed for the funeral to end so I could return home and begin my life again with the man I loved.

The man who had saved me from having to live another moment with Oliver.

The minister spoke a few last words before walking over to me to once again express how sorry he was at the untimely death of such a young and vibrant soul. I simply nodded, afraid if I opened my mouth the truth would come tumbling out.

“My daughter has had a very difficult time. I think I should take her home now,” my father said as he grasped my arm. Looking past me, he said to Oliver’s parents, “My deepest sympathies on the loss of your son.”

His mother continued to cry while we walked away toward the road where the car waited for us. We said nothing on our way there. What could be said? I had no idea if my father knew what had happened to Oliver, and I didn’t care.

I’d never wanted to marry him. My father had wanted that. And now my husband was gone, and I’d be damned if I was going to be shackled to another man simply to suit my father’s business interests ever again.

I sensed Ryder nearby and turned to see him walking behind us, his focus entirely on me. A tiny smile broke the serious look he wore and told me he was as happy to see me as I was to see him.

If only we could talk and hold each other instead of having to pretend neither of us cared the other was so close.

After a ridefilled with nothing but more silence back to the estate, I couldn’t bear not being near him for any longer. When my father and Ryder stopped in front of his office, I said, “I think I want to be alone. It’s been a very tiring day.”

I just hoped Ryder understood my hint and would be able to escape soon.

To my surprise, my father shook his head. “Unfortunately, even on the saddest days, business must be dealt with. I don’t think it will take long, though.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, confused about what part I could have in any of his business.

He guided me into his office as Ryder followed. “We have matters to settle concerning your husband’s death, Serena. I wish it didn’t all have to be dealt with today, but that’s the way of the world.”

I looked over at Ryder and saw him standing stony-faced in his position near the bookcase on the far wall. All I wanted to do was lie in his arms and listen to him tell me about the time when we’d finally get to escape this world of my father’s, and now after enduring days of mourning for a man I felt nothing for, I had to be part of some business deal my father wanted to finalize.

“Dad, it doesn’t seem in bad taste to conduct business today?” I asked, praying to God some tiny shred of decency existed inside him.

He poured himself a drink and sat down behind his desk. Grinning like I said something amusing, he pointed toward the red leather chairs in front of me. “Sit, Serena. This isn’t usual business. We have a will to deal with, so as soon as Oliver’s lawyer gets here, we’ll start.”

I couldn’t believe my dearly departed husband had ever liked me enough to leave me anything of worth in his will. Then again, since his brother was dead too, maybe his will would give me something.

Not that I wanted anything from him. I had my freedom. There was nothing else of worth he could give me.

“Doesn’t that usually happen later?” I asked as I reluctantly sat down.

My father shook his head as his face twisted into a look of near disgust. “I made sure to contact his attorney as soon as I heard he died. No time like the present.”

Clearly, my father wasn’t in mourning about Oliver’s passing. I waited for him to continue speaking, but he opened up his laptop and his fingers began tapping at the keys, so I sat silently wishing for all this to be over and sneaking glances at Ryder as we waited for the lawyer.

A short man with glasses and wearing a brown suit too big for his frame showed up less than an hour later clutching an old leather briefcase. Mousy looking, he looked flustered as he waited for my father to wave him into the office. Robert Erickson had that effect on people.

After they exchanged pleasantries, Attorney Max Frendle sat down beside me and withdrew a stack of papers from his battered briefcase. “Mrs. Landon, as your deceased husband’s attorney, I must inform you that you are the sole beneficiary of his will.”

Every word after Mrs. Landon got lost in my brain as I tried to grapple with being called that one last time. I’d never liked having anyone refer to me as that. It always made me feel subservient. While I didn’t enjoy being called Serena Landon, at least when people called me that I felt like I was my own person and not just the wife of some man I’d been forced to marry.

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