Page 32 of Getting it Right (Addy's Rollercoaster)

“Me too,” I said, giving Teresa a grateful smile.

“So, what else did Barry say?”

“That I shut people out of my life before they can disappoint or reject me.”

“He’s right.”

“I know,” I said. He knew me better than anyone. I would try the best I could to be the woman he thought was beautiful enough to fall for. Even if I only put in that effort for me.

“Now that you acknowledge the problem, you need to fix it.”

“What does that mean?” I had my own ideas, and I wondered what hers were.

“You need to start dating again,” she said, and I nearly dropped my phone.

“No, I don’t. I have you, the bar, and Teresa. I’m not dating.”

I was adamant about it, ending the call shortly after that declaration, but I should have guessed Rachel wouldn’t let up.

My sister teamed up with Teresa and made getting me to date their mission. They sent male friends of their friends to the bar, and I got asked out. A lot. I turned the offers down politely but firmly.

Eventually, my sister and her matchmaking companion gave up. My life was just how I wanted it. The way I could handle it. The way it had to be.

To fill my empty time, I joined a gym and went every morning. Working until closing each night at Footit’s, I began my mornings at ten o’clock, so that was when I worked out every day. Getting in shape made me feel better and stronger.

Addy

Two years later

Days passed. Weeks became months. The seasons marched on around me, and the calendar flipped to another new year. Meanwhile, I tried not to think about how much I was only an observer of events, not a participant, just like I’d been when trapped inside Martin’s penthouse.

“Happy New Year,” Teresa told me as I wiped down the bar like I did every night.

“Same to you.” I turned my head to look at her. She was at the point-of-sale computer, finalizing our numbers. “You look tired. You should go home. I can take care of that.”

“Like you take care of everything. You work too hard, Addy.” She clicked the mouse and shifted to face me. “You never take time for you.”

“I go to the gym every day.”

“You know what I mean.” She blew out a frustrated breath that lifted wisps of auburn hair that had escaped her ponytail.

I made a face. “Are you going to bring up dating again?”

“I’m out of the matchmaking business.” She shook her head, the neon lights advertising Ranier beer flickering red and gold behind her. “But you need other interests outside the bar and other friends besides me.”

“No, I don’t. You know why I don’t.”

“Martin?” she said. “Are you seriously still using him as an excuse?” She clucked her tongue. “Nothing in years. He’s not a man who likes to be ignored. I think it’s safe to assume he’s moved on from being obsessed with you. But have you moved on from being obsessed with him?”

“I hate him. Loathe the man.” My eyes burned as I glared at her. “I’m not obsessed with him.”

“Obsessed isn’t the right word. At least you get animated when you talk about him, which is more than I can say about you the rest of the time.” She came closer and placed her hand over one of mine. “You’re twenty-one years old, old enough to bartend officially. Old enough to do a lot of things. If you’d only just do them. Grow. Evolve. Transform. Or are you going to sleepwalk through the rest of your life because of what happened in the past?”

“I don’t see the problem.”

Teresa sighed. “I think you need something to shake you up to get you living again, but I don’t know what that is. I just know it’s not me. I can’t help you. You’re going to have to help yourself.” She squeezed my hand, giving me a sad look. “I’m moving.”

Unable to believe it, I pulled in a sharp breath. “No.”

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